'Mission From God'
“Joe, I want you to Just sit in that chair and think about things!” Jenna commanded. “If you get up, you can count on another spanking.”
I sat in the little chair, my bottom still stinging, and glanced at my image in the mirror that my sister-in-law had so thoughtfully mounted to the wall in my room. I was still amazed with how tiny I was. Dressed in the pajamas that Jenna made me wear, I looked like a sad little girl. No one would ever guess that I was man about to turn forty.
I was diagnosed with Age Regression Virus less than a year ago. The news hit me very hard, but with help, I came to accept my fate and did my best to plan for the inevitable. I understood that eventually I’d be unable to live on my own, so I made arrangements to live, at least temporarily, with my brother and his wife.
To her credit, my ex-wife invited me to move back in with her, but the idea of living with her and my teenage daughter was too much to bear.
My brother, Tony and his wife, Jenna, had no children. At least I wouldn’t have those issues to deal with. Additionally, they were doing very well financially, and Jenna didn’t have to work outside of the home. I arranged for them to have power of attorney; I only needed to sign a few papers when I thought the time was right.
The fact that Tony and Jenna were born again Christians didn’t really bother me. They could both go overboard with their religion at times, ‘witnessing’ to anyone who would listen, but I had much bigger issues to think about. In retrospect, I should have recognized how ultraconservative and judgmental they’d become. Their daily bible study, long prayer sessions, should have served as warning signs.
I immediately quit work, and did a bit of traveling on my own while I was still able. I traveled to London, then Amsterdam, distracting myself with unusual sights and sounds that at times almost made me forget that I had the virus.
My money was running out, so I returned home. I grew younger with each passing day. It was quite fascinating at first; I’d get up in the morning, rather excited to see my face in the mirror as the wrinkle lines gradually disappeared. I soon discovered that I had a drastically increased energy level, and a dramatically heightened libido.
I hadn’t made any relationships with women since my divorce. As I plummeted though my 20’s and into my teens, I found myself spending hours on the Internet in a futile attempt to satisfy my sexual appetite. I confess that I spent hours masturbating, filling my hard drive with many types of pornographic images.
Then it suddenly got tough. As I dwindled in height and my body mass decreased, I had constant problems with diarrhea. Soon it seemed that I had to urinate at least once every hour, and regular bouts with nausea caused me to vomit several times a day; vile putrid green matter in unbelievable quantities.
One day a neighbor found me passed out on my kitchen floor, covered in unspeakable filth. An ambulance was called and I was immediately hospitalized. In my misery, I gave my brother complete power of attorney so that he could take care of my personal matters. My incredible transformation continued unabated; no one had told me that the final stages of the process would be so difficult. I was too dizzy to even sit up in my bed; the world spun, as it grew larger and larger. Finally, it was over.
I am 30” tall and weigh about 26 pounds. I can walk quite well, and although my voice is very high, my articulation is perfect and I have no trouble making myself understood.
Two days after I bounced, a pretty young orderly pushed me out of the hospital in a gigantic wheel chair. For the trip home, the hospital gave me some simple white pajamas to wear, with little blue fabric slippers. Initially, I sat in the chair with my legs dangling over the edge of the seat. Without a word, the girl pushed me back in the chair, forcing me to tuck my legs underneath.
The automatic door slid open and suddenly we were outside. It was a glorious sunny spring day and, rising to my feet, I took a deep breath of cool, fresh air. I felt good for the first time in weeks; in fact, I felt great. For just a moment, I thought that perhaps everything would be OK after all. I stood on the sidewalk, enjoying the sunshine and appreciating being outdoors after several weeks of being bedridden.
“He’s all yours,” I heard the orderly say as she disappeared into the hospital with the giant wheel chair. Turning around, I saw nothing but a pair of massive legs. I looked straight up; Tony was smiling down at me with that familiar goofy grin I’d known since we were kids. I was startled to realize that my head came only up to his thighs, and wondered if I’d ever adjust to being so small.
“Hey little brother,” he chuckled.
“Very funny,” I replied, annoyed. “Where’s Jenna?”
“She’s busy at home getting things ready for you,” he said, pulling the door to his minivan open.
I looked up. By this time, I’m thinking that I’ll probably be looking up a lot from now on. Installed on the seat was a child safety seat.
“Sorry, Joe. It’s the law. Up you go!” He placed his hands under my arms and effortlessly hoisted me up into the seat.
“Damn, you sure have a lot of hair!” Tony said from the front as he weaved through traffic. It was a lame attempt at conversation, but I couldn’t fault him for trying. After all, what do you say at a time like this? “We cleaned out your house while you were in the hospital. We had a sale and got rid of most of the stuff that you won’t be needing.”
“What about my motorcycle?” I asked. My beloved Harley; how I’d miss taking rides on her.
“The guy who bought it picked it up yesterday,” Tony replied simply.
“How about the truck?”
“It sold last week. The house is empty and we have it listed with a realtor. The price is right; Jenna and I think that we’ll have an offer within a week or two.”
“Good, I suppose,” I mumbled.
“Listen, Joe. I know that things are really tough for you right now, but I think I need to tell you something before we get home.” He adjusted the rear view mirror so that he could look back at my face, then he turned the radio off. The silence was deafening. “Jenna found some stuff on your computer, and she’s really on the war path.”
I filled my little lungs with air and sighed heavily. “Look at me Tony,” I croaked. “I look like a fucking baby! At this point I really don’t give a shit what Jenna thinks.”
“And that language, Joey. It’s bad enough from an adult…”
“I AM an adult,” I shouted back angrily, “Lets get that straight right now. And my name is Joe, not Joey.”
Tony didn’t seem to hear me. He raised a hand to his chin, carefully choosing his words. “Jenna and I have prayed a lot about this Joe. We think that God gave you the virus for a reason, and it was His will that brought you to live with us.”
Oh boy, I didn’t like the direction that this conversation was headed. I didn’t like it one bit.
“We’re happy that you’re coming to live with us, but you have to understand that it’s going to be done on our terms. We’re going to teach you about Jesus. That means family bible study every day, and church every weekend.” He turned the vehicle into a subdivision that I vaguely recognized as being my brother’s neighborhood. “And, like I said, Jenna saw the stuff in your computer just last night. To say that she’s angry would be an understatement. I suggest that when we get home, you simply cooperate and do exactly what she says until she calms down. It will be easier for everyone that way.”
“Tony, turn this car around and take me back to the hospital,” I demanded. “I’ll find someone else to live with. I appreciate your help, but this just isn’t going to work out.”
“I can’t do that brother. You don’t seem to understand.” He turned for just a moment when we stopped in his driveway, and he smiled back at me. “God sent you to us so that we could help you accept Jesus Christ as your savior. We know that he has given you to us so that we can show you the error of your ways.” He shut the car off and pulled the keys from the ignition. “We are not going to let him down.”
Before I had time to think about what he’d said, the car door opened. Tony’s wife looked in, and examined me grimly. As her eyes moved over my body, her face broke into a big grin. She reached for the straps that held me in place, groping at my crotch for the buckle. “Hi Joey. Welcome home!”