Databasing Down by EgArednu Sphinx and by Tabula Rasa

submitted by TabulaRasa - May 1, 2002

EgArednu Sphinx and I have written another, somewhat different story about a young computer technician for a high school who adds himself to the class list.



Aaron was not, on the whole, happy with his life. He had dropped out of college planning to become a computer programmer, but his limited skills and the crash of the technology market had ruined that. Instead he'd ended up as a "technology consultant" for the Tainton school district. What this meant, in practice, was that people constantly called his tiny office demanding repairs to their computer (immediately!). Given that most of the teachers had no idea how to use a computer, repairing a computer often meant such difficult tasks as plugging them in or turning on the monitor. (One older teacher called at least once a week to complain that the computer no longer accepted her password. No matter how many times he showed her the caps lock key, she refused to try it before calling him, and now that the students knew, they would intentionally press it while she wasn't looking.)

What made the job worse was the lack of meaningful human contact. At twenty-two, he was closer in age to the students than to most of the teachers, and as a college dropout, none of the teachers had any desire to interact with him. Moreover, his boss worked in town hall, which meant that on many days he never talked to anyone except about their computer.

Aaron had always prided himself on creativity. Where others had criticized him for a lack of willingness to stick to whatever he was doing, he'd always viewed it as an unwillingness to keep going with something that didn't work. Instead, he tended to come up with unusual ways to get around whatever was in his way.

Aaron was actually in charge of computer repairs for three neighboring schools, a high school, a middle school, and an elementary school, stretching over a block. Officially, the theory had been it would allow more interaction and offer opportunities for kids to take advanced classes. In truth, it had more to do with property values and under the table deals. Given the technical incompetence of the people he worked for, computer security wasn't a high priority, and he had access to almost every password in the system.

One day, about a week before the new year started, he went into the system and added a new student to the database. Aaron Smith, a eighteen year old Senior who had transfered from a neighboring city. He signed himself up for courses he thought he could handle without trouble (after all, he didn't need to worry about getting into college), and then went shopping for clothes like kids wore around the school.

The night before school started, he tried on his new outfit. As he'd hoped, he looked just like a typical high school senior in his baggy jeans and rock band t-shirt. When he got up, more excited about school than he'd ever been when he was really going, he quickly got ready and showed up for class a few minutes early. His first period class was English with Elaine Billingham--Miss. Billingham now--one of the younger and more attractive teachers in the school. That had been a risk, but when she called his name and looked at him, he didn't think she recognized him. Most of the first class was administrative (mostly reminding them that they were supposed to have written a paper over the summer, and had one week to "finish" it), but at the end, she asked to speak with him.

Rather annoyed that he wouldn't have a chance to talk to his new classmates and (hopefully) friends, and afraid that she'd recognized him, he responded, "Um, what is it Miss. Billingham?"

"I just wanted to welcome you to Tainton High. When I was a junior in high school, my family moved, so I have some idea of how hard it can be. If you need any help, I hope you'll feel comfortable talking to me."

"Oh, well, thanks Miss. Billingham. But I should be getting to my next class. Do you know where room 242 is?"

"Sure. It's down the corridor to your left, up the stairs, and just to your right."

"Great. Thanks." And he ran off. She hadn't recognized him, even after that conversation. Although a t-shirt and baggy jeans probably looked pretty different from the slacks and tie he had worn the last time she'd seen him. Of course, he knew exactly where room 242 was, and arrived at Mr. Ollenburger's math class only slightly late, grabbing the only empty seat in the back of the room.

"And you must be Mr. Aaron Smith, hmm?"

"Um, yes."

"You are late. On the first day of class. Not an auspicious start, don't you think? Do you have an explanation?"

"Well, Miss. Billingham wanted to talk to me after class, and..."

"So you were a trouble maker in her class as well, Mr. Smith? Not an auspicious start at all. Well, as I was just informing those of your classmates who deigned to arrive at the proper time, every minute late will be one point off of your class participation grade." He made a note in the grading book he had open in front of him. "Now then, this year we will be studying statistics. Statistics is the study of..."

As Mr. Ollenburger droned on, Aaron's neighbor leaned over and whispered, "That sucks, man. This guy must have the hugest stick up his butt."

Aaron grinned and nodded. "Yeah. Probably lonely, just him and his statistics alone in bed at night."

"Definitely. Hey, I'm Mitch, by the way. Are you new here?"

"Yeah."

"I didn't think I recognized you. Stop by my table at lunch and I'll introduce you to people."

"Cool, thanks."

At which point Mr. Ollenburger, who had turned away from the board, caught them. "Mr. Smith, you appear to have lured Mr. Hanson into your rather dubious behavior. I don't know how things were done at your old school, but here you are expected to be quiet when your elders are talking. Since you apparently need practice, why don't you try it out for a few hours in detention this afternoon. Mr. Hanson, since Mr. Smith is new here, perhaps you'll show him how detention works here, hmm?"

Mitch turned away and started writing furiously. Aaron worried that Mitch would hold the detention against him, but after a minute, Mitch handed him a sheet of paper with an obscene drawing involving Mr. Ollenburger and a pie chart. Aaron had to bite back a laugh to avoid attracting the teacher's attention again.

Next came physics, and then an elective he'd signed himself up for, woodworking. Both were dull, and he had a great deal of trouble finding a partner in woodworking. Most of the seniors already had friends in the class, so he got stuck with a pimply, bespectacled girl who noone else would team up with.

Finally lunch came, and he found Mitch sitting at a table with a group of other people.

"Guys, this is Aaron, the guy Mr. Olleburger was such an ass to. Aaron, these are," and he quickly named the dozen people crammed around the table.

"Hi. I just transfered," Aaron said, suddenly nervous despite the four year age gap between them.

Mitch moved his chair a little to make room for Aaron to pull one up, but the conversation quickly turned to various things people had done (mostly, as it turned out, other people) over the summer ("And did you hear Jim and Nicole actually got back together in July, but then she ran into Michael, and you can just guess where *that* went!"). Since Aaron didn't know any of the people involved, he ended up eating lunch quickly, and was rather relieved when the bell rang for his next class.

At the end of the day, he and Mitch met up outside the room where detention was held. To Aaron's surprise, Miss. Billingham was handling detenion that day, and looked surprised (and perhaps dissappointed) to see him.

"So, Aaron, how did you end up here today?"

"Well, I was late for my class with Mr. Ollenburger--right after my class with you--and he was really upset, and then Mitch sort of expressed, um, empathy, and Mr. Ollenburger gave us both detention."

"Empathy? So you were paying attention in class today." She paused and thought for a moment. "Well, obviously I can't disagree with Mr. Ollenburger's judgement, since talking in class is grounds for detention." She smiled slightly. "But, since it's the first day of school, and since you're the only people here, I could let you go early on one condition."

"What?" Mitch asked eagerly.

"That you don't tell Mr. Ollenburger." And she winked at them.


Mitch raced out of the room. "Come on, Aaron. They probably haven't even picked teams for b-ball yet."

Aaron ran out of the room, then stuck his head in for a moment. "Thanks, Mis. Billingham."

"No problem. Have fun."

After the game of basketball with Mitch's group of friends, Aaron went to his office. It was only the first day of school, and noone had noticed his absence. In fact, there was only a single message. He went to Mrs. Gaines' room and depressed the caps lock key, then went home. All in all, the best day he'd had in a long time.

The rest of the week, unfortunately, went downhill. After a couple of days, Mitch stopped going out of his way to drag Aaron into everything, and none of his other friends seemed to take to him that well. Indeed, while most of them seemed like nice enough people, they seemed quite comfortable with their clique, and Aaron was having a great deal of trouble breaking in.

That Saturday, he considered his options. He knew that one of Mitch's friends had had a large party the night before ("the last big party of the summer!"), to which he hadn't been invited. He also knew, having been a senior once himself, that he would probably be able to break into the group eventually, but it would take a while.

Aaron considered his options. He could keep going at this, but it would be a while before he really fit in, and by then the year would be almost over. He didn't have any chance of doing it for a second year, since by then many of the juniors would recognize him. Or he could go back to his job, and forget the whole idea. He glanced at his bed; a set of work clothes was laid out in case he needed them in a hurry, and next to them was a t-shirt and jeans he'd tossed there like any high schooler would. And then, as he glanced in the mirror, a third option came to mind.

Looking in the mirror, he was impressed by what a good job he'd done of making himself look like a high school student. If he hadn't known better, he would almost have believed the act himself. The question, however, was whether he could take it a step further. Examining his reflection, he decided he could.

First, he went to a barber shop to get the most childish haircut he could think of. He swung by Wal-mart to pick up some slightly less mature t-shirts, and a couple basketball jerseys. Then he went back into the database and removed Aaron Smith, forging an e-mail from the principal to all of his teachers notifying them that he had transfered out. He then added a new Aaron, Aaron Schwab, a fourteen year old freshman. He made sure not to sign up for classes with any of the same teachers, and, with those adjustments to his outfit (and the addition of a backwards baseball cap), he thought he'd done a fairly good job of making himself look like a freshman. It occured to him that, for the first time in his life, he was glad he was a little short, since a short twenty-two year old still made a tall fourteen year old.

He made it a point to shave close, as a senior it had been cool to be scruffy, but few freshman even needed to shave. And he didn't want to look out of place, since he was already pushing the limits of his disguise. He even managed to avoid any cuts, which also helped his disguise.

He got to school a little early again. His first class was algebra with Mr. Schenk. He was one of the few computer savvy (or, at least, not illiterate) teachers, so he hadn't ever seen Aaron before. As he found a seat in the middle of the room, and listened to some boys giggle behind him, he realized there was still something to give him away. He may be able to pass as a 14 year old in looks, but puberty...well, that couldn't be reversed. Then he realized, if he made his voice crack a few times, like a late bloomer, he wouldn't be expected to talk much.

Mr. Schenk started the class with a pop quiz.

"Aaron Schwab?"

"Yes sir?"

"You may skip this quiz if you'd like, just be prepared from now on."

"Thank you-" CRACK "sir"

There were a few stifled giggles, and Aaron managed to blush a bit.

"That will be enough, class." He gave Aaron a friendly smile.

The class went back to work on the quiz, a little madder at Aaron. He wasn't a teacher's pet, not yet. But if he wasn't careful...

Mr. Schenk stopped Aaron after class. "Don't worry about it too much, OK? It's quite natural. And all the boys in here have or will have the same problems."

Aaron just nodded. He knew quite well what it was like to get through puberty. Did he really want to do it again?

Gym was next. Aaron was told where to get a uniform, and told to have it the next day. He made a mental note to shave off some of his chest hair that night, just in case.

There was nothing special about the rest of the day. Aaron was careful to limit his vocabulary and hide his skills in classes, puposefully missing a few answers and cracking his voice often. Still, he decided to avoid a repeat of what had happened with Mr. Ollenburger, and sat in the front of each class, scribbling notes attentively.

He played a game of b-ball on the underclassmen court after school. He got picked first, which caused more grubling from his 'classmates'. Still, he was easily the tallest guy out there, and he did play well.

At the end of the first day, he realized that he hadn't really met anyone. But it was only one day.

That night he made sure to shave his chest, which actually proved much easier than he'd expected it to be.

His second day of ninth grade was similar to the first. He stayed on good terms with his teachers, but hadn't managed to make any friends. He'd expected the freshmen to be open and willing to meet new people, but most of them had social groups left over from middle school. He did, however, stay on good terms with his teachers, keeping up his good (but imperfect) answers in his academic classes, and, of course, dominating in gym. The act became easier, and by the end of the day, cracking his voice had become second nature.

It took several more days before he realized that he had a problem. His teachers all loved him (indeed, Mr. Schenk had suggested that he join the math team, and his English teacher had expressed interested in encouraging him to do some "outside writing.") And that was precisely the problem: since the teachers liked him, the students hated him. The reason noone sat with him at lunch was that they thought he was a teacher's pet. The fact that he kept beating them in basketball, which he'd hoped would earn their respect, had instead earned further distaste.

And so, one again, Aaron considered his choices. There were now three sets of clothes laid out on his bed. His slacks and shirt for his real life, the jeans and t-shirt he wore as a senior, and the shorts, t-shirt and jersey of his fourteen year old doppelganger. His job was unimportant enough that noone had noticed he wasn't around: all he did was stop by in the evening and fix the short list of complaints which had accumulated during the day. There really didn't seem to be any point in returning to that. On the other hand, life as a freshman was already a disaster, and he couldn't go back to being a senior without finding an excuse for disappearing for a week.

Actually, he'd been seen enough by now that he couldn't safely be any kind of high schooler. Which meant there was nowhere to go but down.

Once again, Aaron was impressed by what a good job he'd done. He hadn't even had to shave all that much. His disguise was, in his own opinion, flawless. Which meant, if he were really daring, he could take it a step further. Middle school had been unpleasant enough the first time through, but he looked like a typical freshman, and that meant that with a little work, he could drop off another three years.

A brief session with the database transferred Aaron Schwab out of ninth grade and Aaron Michaelson into sixth grade. In fact, he was feeling confident enough to put himself into Mrs. Gaines' class. He'd always wondered how someone who couldn't understand the caps lock key could teach a class, and this was his chance to find out.

He though about another trip to Wal-mart, but realized, to fit in right in the elementary school arena, he had to be "kool". So instead he went to the mall, and grabbed some clothes with labels. He got some weird looks...a freshman didn't often go shopping to look younger, but he ignored it. Soon he had Flamehead t-shirts, Tommy shorts, and skate shoes. He thought about getting a skateboard too, but decided not to.

He arrived in the 6th grade classroom a little early, and 'met' Mrs. Gaines. She saw his somewhat rebellious style of attire, and told him she would tolerate a smart mouth, but was otherwise happy to see him. She showed him a desk, found him a set of textbooks, let the class in, and started.

When she introduced him, and made him stand up he was suddenly nervous...he realized he hadn't shaved that morning. He felt his chin as he sat down. Perfectly smooth. Aaron figured all those close shaves he had done must have bought him some time. He attached himself to a game of basketball at recess and ended up on the skins side. Again he was nervous, but his chest hair showed no sign of growing back.

During the afternoon, he decided to endear himself to his classmates. After all, he was an adult. She couldn't do anything that really mattered to him. The trick would be appearing to be rebellious without being "trouble." He drew a charicature of Mrs. Gaines and slipped it to his neighbor, Jeff. His neighbor smirked, and passed it to his neighbor, at which point Mrs. Gains caught it.

"Well, what's this? And which of you made this lovely little drawing?"

Aaron was quickly ratted out. "Well, Aaron, I'm glad you've come to such a firm, if obscene, conclusion about me so quickly." The class snickered, but was rapidly hushed by her glare. "Why don't you stay for half an hour after school today, so we can discuss your...opinions."

Aaron just grinned. It wasn't like he had anything to do at home. And, as he'd hoped, as people fled the room at the end of the daym he got a number of expressions of sympathy, and, most valuable of all, an invitation to visit Jeff's house after he got out.

Mrs. Gaines just lectured him for a while about trouble makers and new schools and getting on a good track for college. He didn't particularly care, so he just ignored her, and made sure to hit caps lock before leaving.

He ran over to the address Jeff had given him. Jeff's mother greeted him (he recognized her as one of the high school's computer science teachers, the only one who actually knew how to use a computer, and therefore not someone he'd dealth with), and he ended up playing with Jeff on his dreamcast for much of the afternoon.

"Jeff, it's time for dinner. Aaron, we'd be happy to have you if you want to stay."

"Yeah, definitely."

"Shouldn't you ask your mother first?"

"Oh, um, yeah. I'll call home."

And so he left a message on his own answering machine. "Hey, I guess you're not back yet. Jeff's mother--Jeff's this guy in my class--says I can stay for dinner, so, um, I'm going to." Upon prodding by Jeff's mother, he left their phone number as well.

Having subsisted on raman noodle and pizza essentially since he'd graduated high school, a home cooked meal was a welcome change (even if, truth be told, Jeff's mother wasn't nearly as good as his own). The conversation, however, kept him on his toes.

"So, your mother's out late?"

"Yeah. She has to work, and sometimes they keep her late."

"What does she do?"

"She's in, um, marketing."

"Marketing? That's interesting. Who does she work for?"

"Um, I can never remember the name. It's like, four names one after another. Downtown."

"Is she often out late? How about your father?"

"Dad's on a business trip this week. We moved here because he was traveling here so often, but he's still moving around a lot."

"Well, I'll have to come over to welcome your mother at some point."

"Oh. That would be great." Aaron was less than thrilled. "Only, you should wait a couple of weeks, because she's still getting settled in, and she said she didn't want anyone to see the house until it's decorated." That came out in one long breath, as he quickly spit out an excuse to keep her away.

"That's very considerate of you. Just make sure to let me know once I can visit. Actually, maybe I should invite her over for dinner this weekend."

"Oh. I bet she'd love that. Except, she's going back home--I mean, where we used to live--to finish moving. Maybe next weekend."

"Sure. Are you going back with her?"

"Um, I guess. It'll be pretty dull."

"Well, if it would help, you might be able to stay here this weekend."

Jeff's eyes lit up as quickly as Aaron's. "That would be so cool!"

"Alright. Why don't you just bring you stuff over after school on Friday, and your mother can pick you up on Sunday."

"Thanks so much, Ms, um, Jeff's mom."

After dinner, Jeff walked home (after his claims that it was close enough to walk were insufficient to dissuade the offer to drive him, he finally argued that it was important for him to learn his way: after all, he hoped to walk that route a lot).

The rest of the week went well. Aaron managed to walk the fine line between trouble and funny, never getting held after school again, but quietly building up his social stature my mocking Mrs. Gaines behind her back. This time around, he'd gotten it right. He was popular and the work was easy. Plus, he was spending the entire weekend with Jeff. This, of course, necessitated some additions to his wardrobe.

He though about the mall, but it ate up his checking account, so he went to Walmart. And he realized his problem. Jeff was in that in between age. Maybe he wore pajamas... maybe he was up to the t-shirt and boxers age. And he couldn't afford both. So, hoping for the best, Aaron grabbed some boxers. So, on Friday, loaded down with a duffel bag and a backpack Aaron headed to Jeff's for his first sleepover in years.

Jeff's mom was a great host. To the boys, that meant she left them alone, except when they wanted food. Far too soon, to both their minds, it was bedtime. Jeff went to the bathroom and changed into pajamas. Which left Aaron quite stuck. He didn't want to offend Jeff with his more cool clothes, but he didn't have pj's either, so...

"Ummmm...Jeff?"

"Yeah?"

"I think I forgot my pajamas."

"So you're a dork! Don't worry about it, though. I think I have some extras."

Jeff went back to him room. He dug around for quite a while before he came back.

"Well, I think these are a little old, but they should fit you."

He tossed Aaron a pair of pajamas. About the only way to describe them would be Pokemon overload. Still, pajamas were pajamas, and Jeff was the host. Aaron went and changed.

"They fit pretty well, Jeff. Ummm..." Aaron blushed, "How old are they, really?"

Jeff looks at Aaron suspiciously for a few seconds. "Pinky swear?"

Aaron could barely contain his excitement. This was free access right into the world he wanted! He held out his pinky. They shook.

"They're not that old. My mom got 'em, 'cuz...'cuz...'cuz I like 'em."

Aaron almost burst out laughing considering his escapades. "Hey man, it's cool. I kinda like 'em too."

Jeff sighed with relief. He entered his bed and Aaron climbed into his sleeping bag. The two spent most of the night talking, despite Jeff's mother coming in a few times to shush them. When they got up on Saturday, Jeff's mother made pancakes, and they played on his dreamcast until the middle of the afternoon. At that point Jeff's father decided to take them to the park, so they got dressed and played a modified game of baseball, with the two of them as one team and Jeff's father as the other.

When they got back, Jeff's mother made both of them shower, and they changed back into the pajamas for dinner. Jeff decided to swap for another pair of Pokemon pajamas, explaining that they fit better.

Aaron overheard Jeff's mother talking to Jeff's father while Jeff was showering.

"It's just that she hasn't called at all. I wonder what kind of mother would leave her kid like that. She's never even met me, and she drops her son off for an entire weekend?"

"Give her some credit. She must be so overworked right now. She probably interrogated him about you, and decided it was okay. Maybe she even called their teacher to ask about you."

"If she called Mrs. Gaines, why didn't she just call me?"

"I don't know what she did. But you have no reason to think there's anything wrong. She'll come over for dinner next weekend, and you'll see that she's a perfectly nice woman trying to care for her son and hold down a job at the same time."

Dinner was, again, passable, and afterwords the boys hung out for a while, before going to bed. After the previous night they were pretty tired, so they fell asleep quickly.

The next day, however, Jeff's mother began getting suspicious.

"Your sure you don't want me to drive you?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. It's not a long walk. I don't want to inconvenience you."

"It's not an inconvenience. Besides, I'd like to meet your parents."

"Oh. Well, they won't be in 'til this evening."

"Then you can stay here until they're back. There's no reason for you to go home to an empty house."

"Um, I need to do my homework."

"You can do that here. With Jeff."

"It's distracting. I work better alone. Also, I left it at home."

"Well, at least let me drive you."

"Really, it's fine."

"I don't mind."

"Um, I didn't want to tell you this. But my family is really into the environment. We don't really believe in cars. So, my mother would be really upset."

Jeff's mother looked at him suspiciously. "But your parents are flying all over the place."

"That's because, because, it's okay because the plane would fly anyway. But you wouldn't be driving otherwise. So it's not okay."

Finally outmaneuvered, Jeff's mother conceded the battle. "Alright. But she's coming over here for dinner next week, right?"

"Oh yeah. She's really looking forward to it."

In retrospect, Aaron should have anticipated the eleven o'clock call, and shouldn't have picked up. Because once he did, he had two immediate problems to confront.

"Aaron, you're still up? Is your mother there?"

Aaron tried to sound drowsy (not a hard feat). "I was in bed. I got the phone 'cause mom's in the shower."

"And your father?"

"A business trip."

"Aaron, what's your address?"

"Um, why?"

"Aaron, what's your address?"

"I'm not supposed to tell strangers that." Panic mode. She was way too suspicious. But if he gave her his address, she'd come over, and see that he was living in a two room apartment. And then she hung up.

For a moment Aaron thought he was safe, at least for another day. Then he remembered that as a teacher, she could get his address through the school's database. He dashed to his computer and logged onto the school network, where, to his horror, he found that the passwords had been changed.

It wasn't long before there was a knock on his door. First he planned to ignore it, but then he heard Jeff's mother calling, "Aaron, I know what's going on. If you don't talk to me, I'll just call social services."

Reluctantly, Aaron opened the door.

"You know, I didn't realize who you were until I looked up your address this afternoon. A little digging revealed that a series of Aaron's have enrolled and unenrolled this year. Odd, don't you think? Then I compared addresses, and figured out why you had the access to do what you did. You have a choice now. I don't know why or how you passed yourself off as a sixth grader, but you seem like a nice enough boy, and you're not going to be able to take care of yourself like this. How would you like to be Jeff's brother?"

It didn't take Aaron long to decide. He was having a good time, he really liked Jeff, and she was right. He'd already begun sneaking into his office late at night, since he'd be in a huge amount of trouble if someone caught him entering his office looking like a kid.

And so Jeff's mother--his mother--drove him home.

Jeff met them at the door and tackled Aaron.

"Just consider me the best brother you've ever had!"