Later that day I went shopping with mommy and Amy for our camp stuff. I needed a sleeping bag, and a canteen, a raincoat, shoes, and some other assorted things. Like survival gear. Ugh! And I needed some new shorts and tee shirts. Amy got some things too. She already had a lot of the survival stuff but she got some new clothes. and some of it was sorta racy. I couldn't believe mommy was gonna let her get the tube top, it really made Amy's tits look big, and the short-shorts. I thought it was a kinda slutty look but I said nothing. We got some new swimsuits too, which was ok because I didn't feel like wearing any of my bikini's for a while. I tried a few on but my boobs were so small now, it just looked wrong. I settled for a one piece and a couple of tankini's. Of course, Amy got a pretty revealing one, to which mommy shook her head. I just sort of moped through it all. I really wasn't into shopping, not like this. We were going to stores that I didn't go to before, like Limited Too, and the Army Navy place, and when we went to the big places and mommy and Amy looked at the cosmetics, I was essentially ignored and had to wait until they were done sampling the stuff. Mommy didn't let me wear any makeup at all, not until I'm 13.
We were in the mall and going past the Disney store. "Why don't we look in here," she said.
"Jeez, mommy, that's a kids store," I said. She just looked at me.
"They may have some cute stuff, lets just look," she said. In we went. I guess they did have some cute stuff in there, but most of the clothing had, y'know, cartoon characters on it. Mommy picked up a little 2-piece suit with a tiny picture of Ariel in the corner and held it up to me.
"I already got a new suit," I said. "And I can't take something like this to camp mommy, I'd just die!"
"I remember you had a suit with Ariel on it when you were about 6, remember?" she asked. I did remember. It was pink, and had a picture of the Little Mermaid on it. It had one of those sort of little skirt fringes attached.
"Really, mom, I think Katie's a little too old for that kind of thing now. There's gonna be boys at camp too you know! You always baby her, I'm sure she's embarressed," Amy said, sticking up for me.
"Thanks sis," I said to her.
"S'ok squirt," Amy said.
After shopping we stopped for water ice. While eating a watermellon ice I kept coming back to two questions that kept torturing me. Why. How. I guess the why part is explainable; I sort of asked for it. But how? I kept waiting for some sort of cosmic answer, like there used to be in Greek tragedies, waiting for the deux ex machina to be lowered down on a rope with the explanation. When we got home later I went online to see if I could find any references to this sort of thing. Getting younger. I found a bunch of stories, but that's all they were. Fiction. And the explanations were usally magical ones. That was helpful. Or sometimes scientific ones. But I couldn't find any real scientific sites that dealt with it. I guess that didn't surprise me. I went back to the fiction. Sure, all the explanations were unrealistic but, could I find a thread? Some sort of similarity in my situation? Some way to undo the damage, or at least minimize it?
"What'cha looking at?" I heard Amy ask from behind me. I didn't even hear her come in! I looked up from the screen. She laughed, obviously amused. "Age regression? Are you kidding me? Why are you looking at that stuff? What, you want to be a little girl?" She smiled. "I could treat you like one if you like!"
"Of course not! I was just surfing the net and, uh I saw this link and it took me here. It was an accident," I told her.
"You have to be really careful about what kind of link you click on, some of the sites can be pretty smutty...I think mom would be pissed if she saw you at this one," she said.
"And just what would I be pissed about," mommy said. She looked at the monitor, and then at me. "And just what is all this Katie? I thought I could trust you with this computer. Its a big responsibility, and you promised to stay away from garbage like this. I'm very disappointed in you."
"But mommy, it was an accident! I wasn't even reading this stuff, I just clicked on a link and ...," I started to say.
"...and you are to be more careful in the future dear. I let you have free reign because the childrens sites are so restrictive and I thought if you had to the entire internet that it could help with your homework. But if I catch you at this sort of thing again I can promise you that it will be the last time. Is that understood young lady?" she asked.
"Yes, mommy," I said, closing the window.
"Ok. Dinner in an hour, ok kids?" she said.
"Sure mom," we said in unison.
Amy went back to her room and I sat in front of the screen. I still had no answers, but I was a little embarressed at being caught at that age regression site. I felt like a kid with her hand in the cookie jar! I cruised around AOL and decided to check out the chat rooms. I used to like to check out the member rooms to see if anything interesting was going on, back when I was older and I wasn't was busy with real people as I should have been. As I was scrolling down the special interest rooms I felt strangely embarressed at the sexual undertones of the room names. Yuck, what are these guys talking about! I never felt that way before. I know mommy wouldn't want me looking at this stuff! But then one room name caught my eye..."shouldn't you be older." It could just be a perv room where older guys cyber (yuck!) sex with young girls...but still...I clicked on the room and went in. There was only one person in there, Barry347.
"hello," I typed.
"hello cutegirl228951," Barry responded.
"You can call me Katie," I responded.
"A/S," he said.
"Well, that's the part I'm not sure of. 11/f I guess," I said.
"You guess? Don't you know?" he answered.
"Um, not really," I typed.
"That's a strange response... how can't you know how old you are. I know how old I am," he said.
"How old is that?" I asked.
"25," he said.
"Well a really really weird thing has been happening to me. I used to be 22, and then I got younger and I don't know how or why but I just want everything to be back to normal," I typed. "I saw the name on the room and I thought maybe someone could help me...I dunno."
"I don't know if I can help you, that's a very odd story. So...you're supposed to be 22?" he asked.
"Yes," I said.
"So you are telling me you are 22 and somehow trapped in the body of a child," he asked.
"Yes! That's it!" I answered. Finally, someone who understood!
"What are you wearing sweetheart," he asked.
"Shorts and a tee shirt," I answered.
Why don't you take them off," he asked.
I hesitated. "Ummmm why do I hafta do that," I asked.
"A 22 year old would know the answer to that...don't you?" he asked.
"I...I guess, but I could get in big trouble from my mother if...if she saw me," I responded.
"A grown woman wouldn't care about that. A grown woman who came to a site like this would be looking to play around ....sexually. Is that what you want to do little one?" he asked.
Ewwwwwww! "No! I was just looking for help an....well forget it; I don't do that sort of thing!" I typed angerly.
"Well, if you don't want my help..." he said.
"No, I do, really. Hold on," I said. I took off my shirt and shorts, and sat back down in just my underwear. I felt very exposed in my traing bra and panties. I shivered a little bit, even though it wasn't cold. "Ok, I took off my clothes, and I'm sitting here...in my underwear." I typed.
"Very good. That's a good girl. And tell me what your underwear looks like," he said.
I blushed. "I'm wearing a bra and panties," I said.
"A bra?" he asked.
"Well, its sort like a vest. Its pink and has blue trim. It matches my panties. They are soft cotton," I said, squirming around a little. My hand went to my crotch, to cover up as if he was in the room with me.
"They sound like little girl undies, don't they. Would a 22 year old woman wear them?" he asked.
"N...no," I managed.
"I'm a little surprised that you have a bra on. Its your first bra, isn't it?" he asked.
"Yes, my mommy got it for me," I said.
"How sweet. But its a little big, isn't it. Are you sure you need one," he said. "Maybe you don't. Maybe you aren't old enough for one yet. Look at it again."
I did as I said. "Well, its not really a bra. I'm not old enough for one yet, but mommy said I will be soon. Its more like an undershirt," I said, looking down. My little nipples were completely flat and boyish. Why did i call this a training bra? Its just an undershirt. It said princess collection on it and mommy got it for me at the Disney store.
"Why don't you take off all of your clothes," he asked.
"No! I...I don't do that sort of thing!" I said.
"And why don't you do that sort of thing," he asked.
"For one thing I'm too young..." I typed before I could take it back.
"You are, aren't you? You don't sound like a grown woman. I'm not looking at you, I just go by how you talk, and what you say. To me you sound like a little girl who wants to be a grown up. You were never 22. You don't want to talk about sex because you don't know how to...because you are just a child," he said.
"No, that's not the reason at all," I typed out, but I realized he was right. I don't know the first thing about sex except that I wondered what it felt like to kiss a cute boy, and I would never take my clothes off with one until we were married...and that's about it. Talking and thinking about it felt very funny and made me blush and crawl under my covers with my fluffy doggie and hide.
"That is the reason. Are you sure you are even 11? I bet you're not even 10 years old. You don't even get your period yet do you? You never kissed a boy. You play with Barbie dolls. Your mommy shouldn't even let you online if you end up in rooms like this talking to grown men. Aren't you ashamed little girl?" he said.
And all of the sudden I was ashamed! Very ashamed. But I got my courage up."I am too 11! I am! I am I am I am!" I typed.
"You're lying, and if you aren't going to be honest with me, I'm going to leave," he said. "You're not 11 yet, are you?"
"Not yet..." I said.
"I didn't think so. I think you're almost 9. Almost. Right?" He asked.
"Yes. I'm 8 years old mister. How did you know?" I asked. But he left the room, and I was alone.
I logged off, and got up. I felf funny. The room seemed....strange. I couldn't put my finger on it. My Barbies were strewn on the floor like usual. My period....yuck, I didn't get that yet, I wonder what its like. I couldn't remember what I was doing online. When I signed on again the AOL kids logo came up, like it always did. I must have been at cartoon network, there are some awsome games there. I remembered I was in my undies, and put my clothes back on. My clothes felt a little baggy, like they belonged to someone else. I know I was worried about something but I couldn't remember what it was. Oh yeah, I was talking to some guy who wanted me to take off my clothes. I could have gotten in so much trouble if anyone saw me! I don't even know how I started talking to him, it was all kinda hazy. I thought about going to camp. It might end up being kinda cool, even if I am in the 9 year old bunk. I hope the other girls don't push me around cuz I'm younger than they are. But Amy 'll be there, and she'll stick up for me. I wonder if I'll meet any boys...maybe kiss one...ewwwww, I thought. I don't know if I'm ready for that yet. I picked up my fluffy doggie and went downstairs for dinner.
to be continued?