EgARednu Sphinx and I tried something a little different in this story, so let us know if you think it worked.
Incidentally, the conversation this begins with is based very heavily on an actual conversation between two of my friends, although it's been adapted a little to fit the story line.
"Agh! She is so annoying!" Caroline slammed the door behind her as she entered our room. "For weeks, every time I get a phone call, I say, loudly, 'I'm going to leave the room so I don't bother my roommate.' And she STILL hasn't gotten the hint."
Josh and Andy looked at each other. "Why does she have to leave the room when she gets a call? I mean, when I get a call, I don't leave, even if Josh is in the room."
"Sure, sure, and that would be fine," she responded, "if Grace weren't so loud. She screams everything into the phone, and she's always either yelling at her parents or engaged in sex talk with her boyfriend."
"I suppose that could be annoying..." Andy answered.
"And another thing. She wears little girl underwear to bed."
"Wait a minute, don't most people wear underwear to bed. Most guys just wear their boxers, right?" Josh, who had barely looked away from his computer up to this point, finally took interest.
"Well," Andy ventured, "boxers are practically shorts."
"No, they're definitely more revealing. Besides, some guys wear briefs to bed."
"I don't know. I wear briefs, but I usually wear sweatpants to bed."
"Right. I mean, when I'm at home I just wear an oversized t-shirt to bed, but when I came to college, I got flannel bottoms. It's just politeness towards your roommate. Also, you don't wear frilly white panties with cartoon characters on them into college."
"Well," Josh responded, "I don't wear frilly white panties, but if anything my choice in underwear has regressed." He lifted the band on his sweatpants and glanced briefly at his underwear. "Right now I'm wearing Taz underwear, and a lot of my underwear has characters on it."
"It's different for women. Besides," she said, grinning, "we all know guys don't mature beyond the age of twelve."
"Hey! What's that supposed to mean? I think I'm a little more mature than a twelve year old."
"Uh-huh? Really?" Caroline wandered over to the televsion in our room and kicked the Super Nintendo attached to it. "I can't help but notice that you're both still playing video games. Let's see, what you two have been playing." She leaned down to look at the game in the machine. "Street Fighter? So I suppose that neither of you played Street Fighter when you were tweleve?"
"No, of course we did, but..."
"And what do you watch on television? Why, I seem to recall seeing basketball, football, and The Simpsons. Other than Saturday morning cartoons, you watched the same things six years ago, didn't you? Face it, BOYS, you haven't matured a day. And I can prove it."
"Go ahead. Do what ever you can to prove that!"
Grinning, she opened the door and left.
Excerpts from the Lab Notes of Caroline Antioch:
Day 1 (Thursday), 6:32pm:
Slipped 5mL of Regror into Andy's drink at dinner.
Day 1, 7:45pm:
Visted Andy and Josh's room. Both subjects were studying; a brief conversation showed no noticeable change in Andy's behavior.
Day 1, 9:13pm:
Visted Andy and Josh's room. Josh was working, but Andy was using Super Nintendo. When asked about his homework, responded that he would "finish it before class tomorrow, or something."
Day 2 (Friday), 12:12pm:
Had lunch with Andy and Josh. Andy appeared unusually nervous, and followed Josh around. Was quieter than usual.
Day 2, 2:35pm:
Spoke to Josh (Andy was at class). Cautious probing did not reveal any perception of change in Andy's behavior.
Day 2, 2:39pm:
Andy returns from class. Transcript of conversation:
C: Did you ever finish that assignment?
A: Which?
C: For your class.
A: Oh yeah. No. I told my teacher that I forgot it in my room.
C: Why didn't you do it this morning?
A: I started it, but it was really boring, and there were people playing frisbee outside, and I decided to play with them.
Day 2, 6:23pm:
Ate dinner with Andy and Josh. Andy seemed quite shy, and followed Josh, taking the exact same food that Josh did.
Day 2, 10:44pm:
Visited Andy and Josh's room. Andy had changed into sleepware (sweatpants) and was using Super Nintendo. When asked about homework, responded "I did it already." Surreptitious investigation of desk revealed this to be untrue. Figure 1 is a photocopy of Andy's physics problem set. Note that he solved only two of the twelve problems, and that both answers are unsupported and barely legible.
Day 3 (Saturday), 11:21am:
Josh visited my room. Complained that Andy had woken him up at 8:30 by turning on television to watch cartoons. On investigation, Andy was sitting cross-legged on floor of his and Josh's room, watching a cartoon, still wearing sleepware.
Day 3, 12:05pm:
Josh suggests that Andy come to lunch with me and Josh. Andy refuses, saying that he just began a show.
Day 3, 12:37pm:
Andy joins me and Josh at lunch, still wearing sleepware. He looks flustered, and ends up not taking any food.
Day 3, 9:00pm:
I ask Andy's neighbors if they think Andy has been acting oddly lately. Results:
Josh: "I think he's stressed out, since he's been playing more video games, and watching more t.v.. But otherwise, no."
Grace: "No, not that I've noticed."
Sandra: "Maybe he's been a little quieter than normal. But not really. Maybe he's not feeling well."
Michael: "No"
Vince: "Definitely not. Andy's a good friend, so I'd be the first to notice is something was up."
Laura: "Nothing I've seen, but I don't seem him much."
Day 4 (Sunday), 12:17pm:
Ate lunch with Josh and Andy. As usual, Andy followed Josh around at picked up the same food he did. Based on success with first subject, poured 5mL of Regror into Josh's drink.
Day 4, 7:45pm:
Visited Josh and Andy. Josh was working, Andy was watching television.
Day 4, 8:31pm:
Visited Josh and Andy. Josh was working, Andy was using Super Nintendo.
Day 4, 9:57pm:
Visited Josh and Andy. Josh was working, Andy was watching televsion.
Day 5 (Monday), 12:03am:
Visited Josh and Andy. Josh was working, Andy was watching television.
Day 5, 6:07pm:
Ate dinner with Josh and Andy. As usual, Andy followed Josh around. Josh took a bowl of ice cream, a bowl of jello, and a slice of cake for dinner. Andy seemed unwilling to do same, and took a chicken dish.
Day 5, 8:41pm:
Visited Josh and Andy. Both were using Super Nintendo. When asked about homework, Josh responded "I'll do it later" (Andy did not respond). Josh smiled at me oddly.
Day 5, 9:07pm:
Visited Josh and Andy. Both were dressed for sleep (Andy in sweatpants, Josh in Mickey Mouse boxer shorts) and watching what appeared to be a horror movie. When I opened the door, Josh yelled at me and ordered me to close it. Josh then opened door and apologized, saying "I didn't realize it was you."
Day 6 (Tuesday), 4:26pm:
Encountered Josh and Andy in hall, both with shopping bags. Transcript of conversation:
C: "Why did you both go shopping today?"
J: "My clothes were really boring."
C: "What do you mean by really boring?"
J: "Well, like my t-shirts are all plain colors, and I like shirts with stuff on them."
C: "Stuff?"
J: (Gesturing to current t-shirt, which has picture of Sonic the Hedgehog) "You know, characters and stuff."
Day 6, 6:01pm:
After Josh and Andy leave for dinner, sneak into their room and rummage through drawers. Both have made piles of what are presumably "old" clothes. On investigation, Josh has removed all of his plain (without a cartoon character of some kind) boxer shorts, and both have removed all of their plain t-shirts.
Day 6, 6:17pm:
Ate dinner with Josh and Andy. Josh is still eating only desserts. Josh definitely looked at me oddly.
Day 6, 10:52pm:
Visited Josh and Andy. Tripped over wire strung across door frame. Josh and Andy both found this hilarious. Transcript of conversation:
J: "That was so great. We already got Vince that way! Sit over here and watch this."
(Picks up phone and dials)
J: "Michael, I have the coolest thing to show you. Get over here quick!"
Michael entered room, and tripped over wire. Josh and Andy laugh uproariously.
Day 7 (Wednesday), 6:27pm:
Josh and Andy have been out all day, and come to dinner later than usual. Both of them have gotten their clothes very dirty. They explain that they were "out playing" all afternoon. Eating habits as before. Transcript of conversation:
J: "Hey, Sandra, Knock Knock!"
S: "Um, who's there?"
J: "Sandra"
S: "Sandra who?"
J: "Sandra-bout your toes at the beach"
(Andy and Josh both laugh. No one else does.)
J: "Okay, what do you call a bee that is always complaining?"
V: "Um, annoying?"
J: "A grumble bee!"
(Andy and Josh laugh)
Josh was clearly watching me all dinner.
Day 7, 10:06pm:
Grace stormed into room, wearing shower curtain around body. Apparently someone had stolen her towel while she showered. Quick investigation revealed Josh to be the culprit.
Day 7, 10:44pm:
Visited Josh and Andy. Both were playing Super Nintendo. Josh stopped playing and sat too close to me; Andy continued playing. I think Josh has a crush on me.
Day 8 (Thursday), 12:30pm:
I ask neighbors what they think of Andy and Josh's behavior. Results:
Grace: "Have you noticed how immature Josh has been lately? What a jerk, stealing my towel."
Sandra: "Something's definitely going on with Josh. Do you think he's cracking under the stress?"
Michael: "Josh used to be a good friend, but I can barely talk to him anymore."
Vince: "Oh yeah. I don't know what's going on, but Josh has changed completely."
Laura: "Everyone's been talking about Josh. I hope he's not sick or something."
Day 8, 11:58am:
Slipped 17mL of antidote into Josh's drink.
Day 8, 4:36pm:
Spoke to Josh. Transcript:
C: "How are you feeling?"
J: "It's been a weird week. Would you believe that, for some reason, I got rid of all my checkered and plain underwear?"
C: "Um, I think I can explain. My current research project is on a drug called Regror, intended for treating certain severe mental illnesses. It essentially undoes the effects of puberty on the brain."
J: "What?"
C: "In other words, it leaves the person's memory intact, but returns their underlying thought processes to a prepubescent state, essentially giving them the maturity of a twelve year old. I slipped some into yours and Andy's drinks a few days ago, and then gave you the antidote today."
J: "What? You did an experiment on me? That's so illegal!"
C: "Relax Josh. We've tested the drug, and we know it's harmless. And you did say I could do anything to prove my point--that you two already had the maturity of twelve year olds."
J: "But my behavior changed completely. You were wrong."
C: "I disagree that it changed very much. You lost a few inhibitions, that's it. But, unfortunately, your neighbors do think you've changed, so I haven't really proven anything about your maturity level."
J: "And you've put Andy and me back to normal? Nothing else?"
C: "I said I put you back to normal."
J: "So you left Andy with the maturity of a twelve year old? You can't do that to him!"
C: "Actually, I didn't say that either. Maybe I restored him. Maybe not."
J: "Well, which?"
C: "Can't you tell? If not, I guess I've proven my point after all."