InnocentGuilt
To Hurt Is to Become Chapter 4
Christina still felt this was all wrong deep inside, but her emotions had been so twisted that she didn't know what to think of herself. Was she a 13 year old girl or was she Bill Edwards, the man that her new father claimed to be. Plus she was twisted between the love she had for her new mother and former wife, not to mention the whole relationship between Christina and Chrissy.
Logic seemed a thing of the past. If this was part of CITZEN brainwashing then why were they using such common out of placed elements? Why did it feel so real? When Cindy held her close like she was, parts of her felt the warmth that only a mother could give to there child. Was it possible for them to recreate such a strong emotion? Christina just wanted to forget all that had happened to her and be normal again.
The only thing that Christina was glad about right now was that Cindy had been there the whole night with her.
“I didn't know you were up yet. Do you need me to get you anything?” Cindy asked Christina.
“How can I sleep when there are so many unanswered question. Like how did I get here? If you claim that I'm your daughter then why don't I have memories of being that?” Christina said.
“The doctors said that it was a possibility that some memory loss would happen over a period of time. You just have to give it a chance and try to remember. As far as what caused the coma, you were at cheerleading practice. They told us the girl that was meant to catch you missed, and you hit your head hard. The girls felt bad about what had happened. Most visited each day to till they had to go back to class.” She stood up and walked over to a set of flowers that had a cheering megaphone in it. The front side of it said ”We are cheering for you from the sidelines.”
"They left this for you. It was their way of supporting their head cheerleader even though they knew that you might wake up when they weren't there.”
Christina cried after seeing that. ”I just don't know. None of this seems real to me at all. The only things I seem to remember are the opposite of what they should be. I still remember us being together. I remember the day that Chrissy was born. I remember missing her dance recital and her being mad at me. How can I have memories like these and not remember something about who I am now? It just doesn't make sense.”
Christina started feeling light-headed. The room had started to spin and she felt herself fading away.
“I need a doctor. Someone help me please my daughter something is happening to my daughter!” Cindy screamed.
Back at Headquarters
“Thank God we finally pulled you out.” Mr. Williams in Sarah's body spoke. “Do you remember who you are and where you are?” He asked
Bill started to scream. “ Where's my mother?” He asked.
Mr. Williams shoke Bill hard,” You have to remember. You are Bill Edwards and I am Senator Williams. We are fighting a group of terriosts who have taken over CITZEN. It is them who are responsible for you being stuck as a girl. You once were a man.”
“You tell me that I'm Bill Edwards and then my mother tells me I am her daughter Christina. How am I suppose to believe any of this? Tell me where is my mother? I want Cindy!” Bill screamed. His emotions were starting to change and match that of a confused child. He had no idea what to believe. Parts of him were now scared that the doctors might be playing a test on him to see if he was mentally stable. The only thing he did know and held true was that if Cindy was there he could make it through it. As wife or a mother Cindy was the heart and soul of his love.
A office room at the Headquarters
Reno arrived at the location where Cindy and Chrissy had been sent.
”We need you to come with us and talk to him. Dan, can you take Chrissy and get her some ice cream?” Reno asked.
Dan knew from the sound of Reno's voice that it wasn't good. He agreed to escort the girl.
”But I want to stay with mommy and see daddy,” Chrissy replied.
“Honey, why don't you go with this person? It will only be a second and then we can go see daddy together,” Cindy said.
“Ok mommy.” Chrissy pouted, but she knew that there was nothing she could do. It seemed that little girls just had no say in these matters. Dan put his hand out for Chrissy to grab and she did. The two walked out of the room and left Reno and Cindy to talk.
“As you know, we told you that some problems might happen. Your husband Bill seems to think that he is a 13 year old girl. The brainwashing has affected him in more ways then one.”
Cindy stood in shock. “Does he remember anything about me and Chrissy?” She asked.
“ He still believes that you are Cindy Edwards. The complication is that he has started to believe that you are his mother and Chrissy is his little sister,” Reno explained. “Part of this is due to the fact that they have transformed him into a 13 year old girl. The question now is how much of his former self is still there.”
Cindy fell down on her knees and cried. Her husband who she had loved was lost to her now. The fear that she might never get him back overtook her. She was worried that there would also be problems with Chrissy. How would Chrissy react to the fact that her dad had been reduced to a little girl much like herself? Life just wasn't fair. She wasn't supposed to have troubles like this. What happened to raising a family with the man you loved?
“Take me to him. The only way I can understand what is going on right now is if I see him,” Cindy said to Reno.
“All right, we will be there along side you if you need or want any help,“ Reno said.
“Where is she. You said that you would get her!” Bill screamed.
“We sent Reno to get her. She should be here any minute now. Just settle down Mr. Edwards."
Just then, as if on cue, Cindy entered the room. Bill got up and ran over to Cindy, knocking her down in the process. Now that Bill was face to face with Cindy he quietly whispered, ”I still don't know what truly is going on here. At some moments I am Bill Edwards, your husband, and now I seem to be waking up in a world where I am Christina Edwards, you and that Bill's daughter. Just remember that no matter whatever happens to me, make sure that you and Chrissy are safe. I think I'm getting used to being in this form. I just could never stand losing you two no matter what place or time I am in.” Bill's passion and love still held true.
Cindy just cried. She had feared the worst when she had come into the room. Now here was a child speaking concerned words for her. She knew no matter what the outcome of all this mess that Bill had always been true to her. Even in this form she would accept her husband in their life.
“I understand,” she whispered back. “You've changed so much yet the words you speak still come from my husband. What cruel God could cause such a thing such as this to happen,” Cindy said, with tears running down her eyes.
Bill knew now that this was his world. His wife knew him and everyone else knew him. No matter what happened, parts of him had to remember that this was his world and not slip into the emotional brainwashing that has been going on.
“I do not curse God for what has happened to me. If by some odd fate God has decided this plan is the right course of action, then now is the time to fight. Never is it or should it be the time to curse his name just because some wrongful act has been done,“ Bill spoke pridefully. He rose to his feet. ”As I am now I will not give up. Whatever happens to me can not be any worst then the fate of losing you and Chrissy. Mr. Williams, is there a way that we can strike back at CITZEN and regain control over all that they have done to us?” Bill asked.
“Well said on the preach old boy. However, for now we have been planning out a solution as to how to re-take control. Our first wave of field agents have been sent out to try and over take on CITZEN,” Mr. Williams said.
“Sir, I think you should take a look at this.” Reno went to a tv screen and turned it on. In front of them was a live feed back of their field agents.
Tv Coverage
A male voice was speaking. ”No matter how many you send to overtake us, we shall control all that is ours. This is a small taste of the power that we hold in our hands. If the government should attempt any more attacks at us, we will use our power upon a much larger scale. Behold the chaos as your small little forces are too weak to do anything against us “
An image slowly appeared on the screen. It was that of a man's face. The camera captured every minute of the mans pain and fear. “No matter what you do to me I will not tell anything.” The man screamed. The first noticeable changes were the mans face. It looked younger. The camera then zoomed out, and as it did the image got very clear. He was being regressed that very second. Within a second later the man was gone. All that anyone could see was a pile of clothes. A woman had stepped into the view of the camera. She reached in the clothes and grabbed out a screaming baby. Then the image disappeared.
“You have been warned. This is what shall happen to anyone who attempts to get in the way of Destructions End.”
Back in Headquarters
“What are we going to do?” Reno asked. “For God sake, those were some of the best men we had. Now look at them. Reduced to helpless infants. How the hell do you fight a group with that type of power?”
“We can not lose faith just because one battle is lost. Yes they were good men, but the fight has started and we must finish. No longer are their actions secret. They have just threatened our nation. I won't allow it.” Mr. Williams spoke with glory and passion for a nation that he loved.
“Senator, the President is on line 1,” Dan said.
“Display the call on the big screen. If we are to act as a team and take out this force then no secrets should be held,” Bill responded.
A large video screen where the tv image had been displayed now showed the oval office and the President.
”Reports of what has happened are spreading all across the world. Just what in God's green earth is happening down there! I have a nation that is afraid that they might be reduced to Pampers,” The President screamed.
“Sir, we are doing the best we can. So far only a few people have been affected by the people now controlling CITZEN. I believe I was the first targeted by their evil plan and trapped inside this body. Bill Edwards suffered the same fate as me because I trusted him with protecting my daughter, and the only others are the team of agents we sent in just a little while ago.”
“Only a small group? You might not be aware but we have a whole nation affected. That signal was broadcast live. If they were able to do this on a small scale operation, then how the hell do you think that a large scale operation would look?” The President had interrupted Senator Williams.
“My guess is as good as yours, sir. Chances are we can slip in undercover if we use a smaller team. I plan on using myself, Reno, and Dan to carry out the mission,” Mr. Williams proclaimed.
“I will fight too!” Bill chimed in.
“Just what the hell does a mere 13 year old child think she can do that a group of well trained soldiers can not?” The president exclaimed in a rage.
“This body might be that of a 13 year old, but inside it is the mind of a man who still remembers what those bastards have cost me. I will not sit by and watch what little of a world I have left be turned to shit,” Bill screamed.
“Please, Mr. Edwards you are in no condition to be part of our team,' Mr. Williams said.
“I usually don't approve of civilians being used like this, but I can feel sympathy for what has happened to you. Senator Williams, Bill Edwards shall become part of your team,” the President ordered.
“But Mr. President, he is only a civilian. Why risk it?” Mr Williams tried arguing.
“He may be just a civilian, but you and I we were once civilians too. We felt the need and call to run as politicians. Just train him as you would any other agent and he shall do fine. Besides this is an order from your Commander In Chief. To not uphold the order would be a traitorous act,“ the President spoke.
“I understand.” Mr. Williams responded.
“I now leave you all with the great honor and duty of protecting us all." With those final words, the President broke off communications.
“Damn it, why did you have to speak up to be part of our mission?” Mr. Williams screamed at Bill.
“Because I am involved no matter what happens. Look at what they did to me. How could I just walk away and not do anything?“ Bill replied.
Mr. Williams walked over to Bill and slapped her.
”Damn it! Don't you care anything about your family? Think of what would happen if they were to undergo the same transformations. Think how your wife would feel if she lost you or your daughter. We have no idea how these people are going to react. That is why I don't want you on the mission. That is also why you should think before jumping into something like this,” Mr. Willaims said.
“Enough!” Cindy screamed. “You two are acting like small children and not focusing on what has to be done. If my husband backed out right now then he would be stuck as the 13 year old little girl he appears to be. All the rules of the game changed the moment that you brought him into this sick game. Therefore accept the fact that he is now and will be there to help, otherwise I'll take both of you over my knees and spank you till you understand.”
“And I thought my wife was scary!” Reno proclaimed.
Cindy just gave Reno a evil glare.
”Now if everything is settled and you both agree to behave, I do believe there is a mission of the utmost important to understand. Oh and Bill, when you are finished here come back and meet me so we can explain face to face what's happened to our daughter. I have no idea how she is going to react, but it's best to get it out of the way in case you're stuck as you are when this is over.”
The discussion was plain and simple. Something had to be done about this mysterious group who held all of American hostage. No one was safe as long as they were alive and causing chaos.
“Here is a print out of the blueprints for the CITZEN's construction,” Reno said, laying the blueprints down on the table.
The group scanned over the blueprint for hours, trying to find that one weakness that could allow someone in.
“Iseems there is no weak point," Reno said with a sigh. "Why is it that other groups can break into our secure buildings, but when it comes to breaking in ourself we are clueless?”
“Well, if we had made it so easy then what would be the point of securing it?” Mr. Williams responded with a snarl.
“Uh oh, don't make me call Bill's wife in here to give you a spanking,” Reno replied back. The whole group laughed except for Mr. Williams, who even though he had kept his male personality was having problems with the female body. Sure he seemed big and strong when the moment called him to, but these damn teenage hormones were causing his emotions to get the best of him.
“What's this?” Bill pointed to a spot on the blueprint.
“My God. You know I think the old chap has found it,” Mr. Williams responded. The one spot that Bill had found on the map was a sewage tunnel system that ran down the side of the building. It was the perfect access point. After that everything was easy. All they have to do was settle on a time, equip themselves, and meet.
An office room at the Headquarters
Chrissy had fallen asleep with her head laying on top of Cindy.
“She just fell asleep a few seconds ago,” Cindy said to Bill. Cindy lowered Chrissy head and moved over to where Bill was. Bill was amazed at how tall Cindy seemed at the moment. His whole world was so different from his new perspective.
“I must say that it is odd seeing you like this. Parts of me want to just cry out in pain of what I have lost, and other parts just want to protect you.”
Bill blushed. He was not used to this type of warmth from Cindy. In some ways it was confusing to him on how he should react.
“I just don't understand why they had to do this to me," Bill said, sighing. "Plus, of all things, why did they have to make me female?” Bill asked.
“Being female isn't at all as bad as it seems. Sure there are some moments you just want to scream at everyone, but there is also a special bond,” Cindy replied.
“I know, but why did they have to force me to become it? I'm not ashamed of who I am now. I still have the memory's of who I was. I just don't understand why they couldn't have made me male!” Bill stomped his foot in protest.
“Maybe the technology they used was limited on what transformations could happen,” Cindy replied.
“It can't be that. It just can not be because the guy on the video tape was male and they reduced him all the way down to a baby,” Bill said back.
Cindy sighed.
”Have you ever had any hidden need or desire to be female?” Cindy questioned.
“No, I''ve always been happy with who I was. Not to mention the fact that I have a loving wife and daughter.” Cindy smiled at Bill's words. ”You don't think that it could be due to upsetting Chrissy do you?” Bill asked.
“I fon't know. I just know that it appears you may be stuck as a 13 year old girl for a good while. All I can say is that no matter what, I will try to take good care of you.” Bill blushed at Cindy's words.
“Mommy, who is she?” Chrissy had woken up during the conversation. She was still rubbing her eyes when she asked the question.
“I guess now is as good a time as any.” Cindy got up and went over to where Chrissy was. ”Do you remember when the police men came to the door and daddy disappeared?” Cindy asked.
“Yes,” Chrissy replied, wondering what her mommy was trying to tell her.
“Well the girl over there is your father. This is what happened to him after he disappeared,” Cindy explained
“That can't be daddy. That is just some girl. Daddy is daddy,” Chrissy screamed back with a shocked expression on her face. Bill was sad to see his daughter not even recognize or acknowledge that he was even there. Parts of him wanted to run up and hug her while other parts just wanted to run and cry.
“Chrissy, it is your father. He has been transformed into a girl and that was why we have been brought here,” Cindy explained.
“But I want daddy not some dumb girl. Where's my daddy?” Chrissy screamed. Bill couldn't take it anymore and he ran as fast as his legs could carry him out of the room. If only he had been paying attention he would have noticed Reno standing in his path.
“Ouch,” Bill muttered when he hit the ground.
Reno hadn't fallen but did notice the painful look in Bill's face. He reached his arm down and helped Bill up. To him Bill was just a girl in destress and he would feel guilty not helping any girl out that needed it.
”I overheard the conversation. Cheer up. There's always tomorrow. She will come along and accept the you that you are,” Reno said trying to cheer up Bill.
“If only that were true. If only that were true,” Bill said with tears dripping down his face.