Summer Memories
I flipped through the rack of truck-stop T-shirts, while keeping an eye on the ladies room door. The shirts were a waste, mostly Indian themes or Harley Davidson logos, and nothing that would fit me, I thought with a sigh. Over the years, I had packed on a spare tire or three.
The insulin did it, I could always use that as an excuse and even my doctors agreed it was hard to lose weight with insulin, but....
The scent of something new filled the air. I looked around taking in several deep breaths. Whatever it was smelled delightful, and I felt suddenly tingly inside, and warm all over as a result. I knew the scent, but couldn't place it.
Looking around, I followed the scent to an old man, with steel gray hair, and a wrinkled face that looked ancient enough to be my grandfather. He wore an expensive gray suit, designer shoes, and he held an open green bottle. He looked over at me with a question on his face.
"What is that?" I asked.
He shrugged his shoulders. "A new aftershave, I think.... 'Summer Memories'," he read from the label. "I don't smell much of anything these days. You like it?" He held out the bottle.
I took in a longer sniff, and smiled. "That's it. I know what that is now. It smells just like the fishing hole my dad used to take me to when I was a kid. Man, I hadn't thought of that for a while...." I closed my eyes and could see the place, a bend in the Little Moose River in the Adirondacks. My dad took me there every summer, at least three times, just to fish and talk. I could smell the water, the grasses, and even a hint of my dad's aftershave. I was - seven, eight at the time. I let the thought drop, and opened my eyes.
The label on the bottle said:
Summer Memories
Guaranteed to Take You Back to Happier Times.
I smiled, then frowned as I noticed there was no other information at all on the label. No manufacturer, ingredients, nothing. I took another sniff, and gave the bottle back to the old timer. "Nice, and it did take me back. Where did you find it?"
The man spun around to the shelf so fast that the bottle spilled over half of it's contents all over me. Drenched, and dripping with the lotion, I sputtered and spat out the alcohol taste, and tried to wipe the liquid from my eyes.
"Sorry, I am so sorry, sir. Wait just a moment, and I will get something to clean that up with." The man headed off in the direction of the men's room.
"Are you okay?" a girl wearing an employee's uniform asked.
"Yes, the guy said he would get something, but I'm dripping wet. "Do you have any more of this?" I looked around for the bottle, but realized the man must have taken it with him. "It's an aftershave, I think, called 'Summer Memories'?"
"Never heard of it, but I can check the stock."
"Thanks," I said and headed to the men's room myself. I saw no trace of the old man there, and I dried off the best I could with the towels that were supplied. I washed off my face and hands, then walked back outside to see my wife of twenty-five years, Claire, waiting for me.
"Took you long enough," she said. "What is that awful smell?"
"New aftershave. Some old guy was trying it on, and I asked him about it."
"When we get to the motel tonight, you had better shower - twice - if you have to get rid of that smell." She stepped back a few paces.
"I like it, it reminds me of the summer I was eight, and my dad took me fishing, you know, before he turned into a drunken bastard that beat me every chance he could get."
"I don't care. That has to go. You didn't buy any, did you?" she asked with that "you had better not even think about it", stare.
"No, I was going to, but the old guy spilled that bottle all over me. I need a snack. You want to get dinner here, or wait?"
"I'm waiting, and I suggest you do the same."
"I really need something to eat. I won't be long, but I'm not driving now. I feel kind of jittery."
"Okay, but I don't want to hear about it if you are up all night with heartburn, again, Jason."
****
The clerk at the motel desk looked up as we walked through the door. He frowned and sniffed the air as I walked up.
"You have a room for Todd? Mr. And Mrs.
Jason Todd?"
"Yes, sir. What is that you are wearing?"
"I haven't a clue, really. New aftershave that some guy spilled all over me. You like it?"
"Reminds me of summer camp," the man said with a faraway look in his eyes.
I signed in, took the key, and drove the car around to the room. Claire waited until I had all the suitcases moved into the room before making her entrance.
"Shower. Now!" she insisted.
"Yes, dear," I said in my best henpecked voice. "There's an Outback down the street a bit for dinner.... Okay, okay, I'll shower first."
Claire packed my smelly clothes in a plastic bag while I scrubbed and scrubbed until I could no longer smell the fishing hole. I toweled off in the shower, and took one step out when I felt my stomach heave.
"Jase? Jason, are you all right in there?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. Nothing wrong," I managed to say before I threw up my hamburger and orange juice from the truck stop. I stopped heaving, felt better, and walked out into the main room as if nothing happened. "Ready for dinner? I know I am."
"Okay, but I don't think Outback is such a good idea for you. You are looking rather pale," Claire said quietly. "I did hear you throwing up in there, didn't I?"
"Yes, but no heartburn, and you said you didn't want to hear about," I said, on the defensive side. "I am hungry, very hungry, but you chose, okay?"
****
I woke in the middle of the night, groaning as my stomach heaved. I rolled out of bed, and grabbed the trash can, just in time. I heaved and hurled for what seemed liked hours. I felt a sledgehammer pounding on my guts, and I heaved with every bump.
Before I had the chance to even try to crawl to the bathroom, my bladder gave out, and I soaked myself and kept on going.
"Oh, dear God, Jase, I'm calling an ambulance - now."
I nodded my head, and groaned again as another wave of nausea rolled up from my toes to my lips.
The second I stopped hurling, my body started to shake, all over. God, I was having a seizure on top of everything else. I barely noticed the medics arrive.
I woke sometime later, groggy and disoriented. I looked around the darkened
room, and groaned as my stomach heaved again. Someone was right there with a basin. "Claire?"
"I'm here, darling. How are you feeling."
I finished throwing up before I answered. "Like I've been run over by a truck. What time is it?"
"It's after noon, you've been out for two days."
"Two days? I sat up, then felt my bladder give out. I pulled off the sheets to see that I was wearing an adult diaper.
"I'll get a change. Jason, take a good look at yourself. You've been losing weight, a lot, and...."
"God, look at me," I said holding up my arms, and staring at the thin appendages that were attached to my shoulders. I looked down at my chest, and all too flat stomach.
"You've been getting smaller in a lot of ways, sweetheart. They didn't want to put in a catheter, and you've been having diarrhea so bad...."
"How much weight have I lost?"
"About fifty pounds, and counting," Claire said with a shake of her head. "You look about twenty, twenty-five at the most."
"With my bald spots?" I asked, and ran my hand through what felt like a full head of hair.
Claire fumbled in her bag for a moment, then help a mirror. I stared for a while at the young man's face I saw staring back at me.
"That's impossible. That's not me. I never looked like that when I was twenty-five either."
"I know. I remember. Our wedding pictures? You were twenty-five and I was twenty-three. I can't call you an 'old man' after this, but...."
"This is crazy. People don't age backwards. It's impossible. I'm fifty years old, for Pete's sake. I - I don't mind looking like a kid again, but what do I tell them at the office?"
"I've already called, and they have you out on disability. I put in for Family Medical Leave, and the kids are fine. Debbie's home from pre-med, and Kevin is insisting that he's old enough to stay home alone, but I want a house to come to home
to."
I let myself collapse on the bed, not believing this. Claire pulled off my wet underwear, and changed me like a baby. "Remember that time I had salmonella poisoning? I lost twenty pounds in three days and my kidneys shut down. This has got to be something like that. Okay, I swear no matter how low my blood sugar is, or how
hungry I am I will never eat at another truck stop again."
Claire shook her head, she wiped her eyes. "Jason, I don't think this is something that simple. No matter what the bug it wouldn't make your hair grow back, or make you look so much younger. Look at you, you're gorgeous now, and young. How can I compete with all the twenty something girls that will be falling all over
you?"
"You can't be serious? Claire?" I asked. "It's me, here, Jason, you know, we did that whole for better or worse thing? I've loved you for the last twenty-five years and that isn't going to change. I may look different, thanks to this bug, but that doesn't change the way I feel, ever."
"You say that now, but...."
I felt myself start to shake. As Claire called for a nurse, I passed out.
****
The pounding in my head and my ears woke me up the next time. I found myself in a small space, all metal, with unbearable noise all around me. I started screaming my lungs out, and trying to move my arms. My voice sounded scratchy, and higher than I was expecting.
The noise stopped. "Mr. Todd?" a voice spoke in my ear. "Mr. Todd, my name is Dr. Kline, and we are in the middle of an MRI, we're scanning your body trying to find an answer about all this. I know that must have been a harsh way to wake up, but you have been out for days and this couldn't wait."
"Sorry, I've had...." I cleared my throat. "Sore throat," I said. "I've had MRI's before, just not like this. I'll be still."
"Would you like a pair of ear plugs?"
"Yes, thanks," I said, but I fell asleep again before the tech had the chance to put them in for me.
I woke again, in bed. I glanced around the room and spotted someone with her back to me. "Claire?" I asked, groggily.
"No, Dad, it's me," Debbie said, and turned around. "Mom and I have been taking turns."
I stared at my twenty-one year old daughter, with the blonde hair exactly the shade of her mothers, and shook my head. "What are...." My voice squeaked. I tried again. "What are you doing here?" I held up a hand to rub my throat, then froze at the sight of the now matchstick thin arm I saw.
"It's okay, Dad. You look thirteen now, maybe fourteen." She held up a mirror.
I fell back on the bed, shuddering. That couldn't be me. I looked painfully skinny, and my face, God, my face looked cute now, if not downright adorable.
"Dad?"
"This isn't happening. Where's Kevin?"
"With Mom. Look, Dad, no matter what happens we are here for you."
I took the mirror, and groaned.
"You know," Debbie said. "The term you want for this is 'hottie'. If you were a couple of years older...."
"I think that will be enough of that, young lady. I am still your father even if I look like your little brother. I.... Are the doctors saying anything about this? How I can grow back to me?"
"They don't know...." She trailed off, and for the first time I saw how red her eyes looked.
"Deb? What's the matter?"
"This, this is what's the matter. Daddy, what happens if you don't stop shrinking. Kevin and I got in yesterday morning and you looked maybe seventeen or eighteen, still older than Kevin at least, but now, now you're just a kid. What happens tomorrow when you turn seven then five and down to newborn and beyond?"
"I hadn't thought about that," I had to admit. "Uh, when did your mother say she would be back?"
"She's trying to help Kevin sort through this. I don't know. Why? Do you need a change?"
"Yes, but...."
"I told you I was taking turns with Mom, and I've been changing you since I've been here. Kind of cute, but you are way too young for me."
"Deborah Ann," I sputtered. "I can do it myself, too."
****
I woke feeling great for a change. No more nausea, and my system felt really cleaned out. Enough light filtered through the blinds to let me know that it was during the day, but how many days had it been? I held up and arm and wanted to scream. I pulled off the covers and found myself in little boy's pajamas with cute little animals all over them - even the diapers had cartoon characters on them.
"Mr. Todd?" a man said from the doorway. "Good, you're awake. May I call you Jason? I'm Dr. Kline."
"Ah, the mystery voice has a face now, sure, I know I don't look like a mister anything anymore. About how old am I now?"
"Seven - maybe eight, at least physically. The good news is that you have stayed this way for the last three days."
"I know this will sound strange, but how long have I been here?" I asked, dreading the answer.
"Going on three weeks now. You have lost four fifths of your body weight, and about two thirds of your size. Your body is healthy, and normal for an eight-year old, well, an eight-year old with type 1 diabetes."
"I was afraid of that. I've had it since I was seventeen. I guess it was too much to hope for to get a new pancreas out of this deal. Okay, now what? I'm fifty years old, and look like I'm eight. You have a magic shot you can give me that will turn me back into me, don't you?"
"I wish I did. Look, Jason, what happened to you is beyond anything we ever expected. This regression of yours violates every medical and scientific principle I ever learned including conservation of matter. I can only what you might be going through over this, but then again, you've been sleeping while your family has watched you change."
I nodded. "This has got to be hard on them, too. But what can I do? I have a great career, but I can't go to my office looking like this, and I have a great marriage, but something tells me that Claire and I will not be acting like man and wife for many years."
"Do you have any idea what happened?" he asked me.
"If you don't -- I know I don't. We were driving home from our trip to Florida. We go down to visit her folks every other year or so, and we were on the way back when I pulled into a truck stop. I had to make a pit stop, and get a snack, and I did. I felt sick in the shower.... Oh, my God. Guaranteed to take you back to happier times. I was happy when I was eight, not happier than I was before this happened, but happy. I didn't know any better."
"What are you talking about?"
"An old man, in a gray suit spilled a weird bottle of aftershave all over me. I liked the smell since it reminded me of the summer I was eight, and my father and I were still friends. The stuff said 'Summer Memories', and it was guaranteed to take you back to happier times. The people at the truck stop had never heard of it before, and
didn't have any more, but Claire hated the stuff."
"Look, I don't believe that an old man in a truck stop would have a magic potion that would turn people back into kids."
"Neither do I, for that matter. I really think I was cursed by the wicked witch, you know, the one with the flying monkeys?" I said. "You're the one who wanted an explanation, and that's the only one I have, except for the hamburger I had the truck stop."
Dr. Kline paced for a moment. "Do you still have the clothes?"
"As far as I know. I don't think Claire would have taken them to a laundry mat, since I don't fit into them any more, but I can ask her. She stuffed them in a plastic bag, and my bet is that they are still there."
"What?" my son, Kevin asked as he entered the room. Kevin, at sixteen was a tall boy, still skinny as a rail, but starting to show the adult he would become. He held out a large, gift bag to me.
"What's this for?" I asked as I took the bag, and looked inside. I couldn't help crack a smile as I saw the teddy bear inside. "Thanks, thanks a lot, this is great," I said and looked up at my son. He bent over the bed, gave me long hug, and backed off shaking his head.
"Mom and Debbie bought you clothes, but I thought you might need that."
I hugged the bear for a second, then shuddered. I looked up at the doctor. "I'm
fifty, and I can't believe I just got that excited about a teddy bear. Kev, where is your mother?"
"Right here, sweetheart," Claire said before she entered the room with Debbie right behind her. "Thank God you're awake. You haven't gotten any younger in days and we thought to get you some clothes, and better looking pj's."
"Thanks," I said, until Debbie held up the pajamas. "What are those?"
"Spiderman, Dad. You will look great in this, trust me, and you are so cute...."
"She's right, Jase," Claire said quietly. "Adorable is the word, and I can barely stand it. Now I don't have to worry about those hot twenty year old girls, just the cute nine year olds in the pediatric ward."
"Claire," I said shocked. "I am not now, and I never will be interested in little girls, except in a fatherly way, of course, but.... Spiderman jammies?"
"Dad, there isn't much out there in your size that wasn't designed for a little kid," Debbie explained. I saw the grin she gave her mother, and knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that someone was enjoying this.
"Mrs. Todd," Dr. Kline cut in. "We were talking about possible causes for this change in your husband's age, and do you still have the clothes he wore that night with the aftershave on them?"
"In the car, somewhere, yes, I do. I wasn't sure what I was going to do with them, or any of his clothes, but I can get them for you in a few minutes. You think that awful aftershave could have something to do with this?"
"I don't know," Dr. Kline said. "It's the only thing we have to go on, now."
****
"How are you feeling?" Dr. Kline asked as he walked into the room.
"Like a lab rat chained to a wheel," I said. "I have so much energy now I don't know what to do with it, but with all this hardware attached to me I can barely move."
He smiled, and nodded. "Well, you've been here a week, awake and stable. No more changes, no more seizures and no more shrinking. This is good news. I will have them take off the hardware, except for the IV line, but no more fluids, for now."
"Can I go home now?"
"Not yet. I'd hate to send you out only to have you back in again within a day, and I do want to wait until we get all the results back from that aftershave. So far, they have found some unidentified biologicals in the mix, but if that means anything, I couldn't say.
"I want you out of bed, too. You need to get used to your new size, and energy level, and I want you out of ICU. I don't think you need the constant monitoring, just occasional, but we have a problem."
"I don't like the sound of that," I said. "What's wrong?"
"The Medical ward doesn't want you, because of your size. They don't have supplies for pediatric patients, and the Pediatric ward doesn't want you because of your chronological age. You aren't a child, although you look like one now, and they say they will give the Medical ward the supplies you need, but the Medical ward.... Well, it goes on and on."
"Nice to know I'm so popular. I've grown used to the clothes," I said and pulled at the latest fashion Debbie had picked out for me. "And the size of my bladder. I'm hungry all the time, and I hope that's because I am a growing boy. I will grow up again, won't I?"
Dr. Kline shook his head. "I don't know how to answer that. The scans show that you are a normal kid, eight-years-old, with normal growth plates, so I would say yes, but then again there is no telling. This is new for all of us. If you grew purple scales and dragon wings tomorrow I wouldn't be surprised."
I started giggling. "That's a real pleasant image, Dr. Kline. I can...." I trailed off as my family entered the room.
"And how's my big boy today?" Claire asked me.
"Cute, darling, real cute. Just what I needed to hear. Hey, kids."
"Hey, little bro," Kevin answered with a grin.
I sputtered and glared at my son, with absolutely no effect what-so-ever. This was not good, at least he was joking around. I could imagine what it would be like for me to discipline him from now on.
"What's the word, Dr. Kline?" Claire said, changing the subject.
"I want to keep Jason here, at least until we get the final results of the tests back, but the question is finding him a bed in a regular ward."
"Shouldn't he be in Pediatrics?" Debbie cut in.
"I think so," Dr. Kline answered, without missing a beat. "But the staff of the Pediatric ward doesn't. So, until the Hospital Administration makes the decision, Jason
will be staying here, but I will have the nurses remove the monitor, and the IV bag for
now so that he can get up."
"Thanks," I said, then frowned. "Oh, great, I need to see a dentist, too."
"What's the matter?" Claire asked.
"I have a loose tooth. This is all I need, especially after all the money we've spent on my bridgework over the years. I don't want to lose this one."
Dr. Kline gave me a wide grin. "Jason, you don't need a dentist, guaranteed, but I'd say a visit from the tooth fairy will be in short order."
I groaned, and shook my head. "Baby teeth, I had forgotten about that, then braces, I know how that goes."
****
An orderly walked into my room early the next morning. He checked the chart, and gave me a crooked grin. "Okay, squirt. We're moving you down to a regular room on the kids floor."
No point correcting the man's mistake, I thought, as he pulled the bed from the wall and prepared to move me.
After a short ride to the elevator, he took me down to the third floor, and wheeled me into the east wing. A nurse, and a couple of kids, wearing pajamas with bathrobes met me about halfway down.
"Who is this?" the nurse demanded.
"Jason Todd," the orderly responded. "For room 319"
"No, there's been a mistake. This one belongs on the medical ward, not here."
"What's wrong with him?" a little girl asked.
"There's not enough room here," the nurse said, "now go back to your rooms."
"He can share mine," a boy about my size volunteered.
"No," the nurse half shrieked. "You don't understand. He's not a real little boy."
"He's a girl?" the boy asked and gave me a puzzled stare.
"Nurse Goldstein, it's okay," I said. "I don't bite, really I don't. This isn't my choice, either, but Dr. Kline said you had an empty room here, and there isn't one on the medical ward. Room three nineteen and step on it, Jeeves," I said with a backhanded wave.
"Well, yes sir," the man said with laugh.
"Don't you dare," the nurse said. "We will not have this - this person on this ward."
"What's going on here?" Claire asked from behind me.
"And you are?" the nurse snapped.
"Claire Todd," she said without elaboration.
"She doesn't want me here cause I'm not a real boy. I guess that means I'm a robot, or maybe a puppet. Anyone seen the Blue Fairy?" Most of the kids laughed at that.
"You stop that, Mr. Todd. We know who you are."
"I think someone had better call the hospital administration and get this worked out."
"Can Jason come down to my room and play cards until he gets a room?"
"What about room 319?" the orderly asked.
"No, that's being used for ward business," the nurse insisted.
"Jason is ward business now," Claire said quietly. She walked down the hall, looked into a room, and walked back. "There is nothing and no one in that room. What is going on, here?"
"Good question," an older nurse said from a doorway to what looked like offices. "What is going on here?"
"Mrs. Blackwell, they brought Jason Todd here, after all."
The lady stared at me, and shook her head. "We told them that we do not accept patients like this."
"I'm the only patient in the entire world like this," I snapped. "What's wrong with you people?"
"There will be none of that, young man," she snapped right back. "This is a bad situation for all of us, so please try to understand. We can't have you on this ward with the real children."
"You mean he really is a puppet?" my would be roommate asked.
"No, I'm fifty years old," I explained.
The kid looked at me. "That's nothing. I'm seventy-five."
"I'm a hundred," someone else chimed in. "I'm a thousand." "And I'm a million."
"I'm a million billion gazillion years old," said a girl."
"You don't look a day over a thousand billion gazillion," I added. "See, since I'm the youngest kid here, why can't I stay?"
"This isn't a joking matter," the nurse said. "Okay, everyone get back to your rooms - this instant."
After a general chorus of 'boos' and awwwws' from the kids, some of them did clear out of the hallway.
"I said everyone," the nurse insisted.
"What's going on here?" a man asked from the doorway to an office.
"Dr. Richardson, we didn't mean to disturb you, but the ICU unit sent Jason Todd down here."
"Yes, I've been expecting him. You're Jason? Hi, I'm Eric Richardson. Take him down to room 319. I will need a weight and full set of vitals, Mrs. Blackwell. I'll be in to see you in a few minutes.... Well?"
"But Dr. Robertson, the nursing staff has already informed the administration that we will not accept - this patient on this ward. It isn't right. He's not a real child."
"Since he is doing such a realistic impersonation, then, let's keep him here for the
time being until I can work something out with admin, okay? Take him down to room 319, thanks."
"Okay, do it then, but I want you kids to stay away from that room. Understood? Mrs. Wright is not going to like this."
"Why? I don't bite," I said as the orderly started the bed rolling.
"Hold it right there," a lady's voice said from behind us. I turned and stretched my neck to see her, and could almost hear the music playing as she marched down the hall.
"Uh oh," I commented.
"You got that right, kiddo," the orderly answered.
"What's going on here?" the lady demanded, staring from one nurse to another and back to Dr. Richardson. I saw the herd of kids that had followed her down the hall, but apparently she didn't, or didn't care.
"Hi, I'm Jason Todd, and I'm fifty going on eight. The only reason that I am here, now, on this ward is that Dr. Kline wants to keep me here until he gets all the lab work back. Apparently, the only available bed in this entire building is right here, in room 319.
"If you have a problem with me being here, as these fine young nurses did, then I will be more than happy to have my family get me dressed, and take me out of here, and you can fight it out with Dr. Kline."
"Who let this thing on the ward?"
"Thing?" I demanded.
"Yeah, are you Thing One or Two?" one of the boys asked me.
"Betty, that's uncalled for," Dr. Richardson said. "I let this patient on the ward, and he is here for valid medical reasons. No matter what he was before this, Jason is now a little boy and he belongs here, in room 319. Do I make myself clear?"
"Get these people, and that creature off my ward now, or there will be trouble," she told the orderly.
"Does that go for my little dog, too?" I asked her. Several of the kids laughed, but she shrugged it off.
"Jason," Claire said, shocked.
"She started it," I answered her back.
"Mrs. Blackwell, take the Todd's into Jason's room. I still need vitals and his weight for insulin dosage and calorie count."
"For now," the lady added. "I have a call into Mrs. Grant, and I will let her decide. No one, and I mean no one else is allowed in that room, except staff, is that understood?" she asked the kids.
The orderly finally guided my bed into the room. He helped me slide over to the bed, and pulled up the side rails. He showed me the controls and handed over the remote for the TV before he left.
Actually, I thought as I settled into room 319, I didn't really want the kids in here with me. It had been a long time since I was that age, or even since I had kids that age.
After Claire and the kids left, a nurse came into the room with an IV bag, and hung it on a pole next to my bed. I glanced up at the bag as the lady started running a line.
"Wait a second, Miss. You've got the wrong IV. That's Normal Saline with five percent dextrose, and I'm diabetic."
"That's what the doctor ordered for you. Take it up with him," she said and connected the line to my IV tubing.
"There was a mistake," I insisted as I grabbed the girl by her arm. "No one has
taken my blood sugar since I've been here, and no one has given me insulin. I'm a type one diabetic, and I'm telling you I can't have sugar in my IV fluid. Stop it now, please, and get the doctor in here."
The lady said nothing as she wrapped the IV tube up with so much tape it would take a blow torch to remove it from my hand. The tubing itself seemed to be caught in the bed rails making it difficult, at best, to move my arm. The lady turned and left ignoring anything I had to say.
I pressed the call button, and settled back to wait. After fifteen minutes none of the staff had so much as poked a head in the doorway to see what I wanted. I pressed the button again, and again a few more time, with the same result. I knew they didn't want me on the ward, but to deliberately ignore me.... With a good lawyer, I thought, I could own the hospital over this.
After an hour or so, a nurse did pop her head in the doorway. "Will you stop playing with the call button?"
"I'm getting the wrong IV here, and I really need to go to the bathroom. I can barely move this arm, so I can't get out of bed, and I need to go, please. If you could untangle the wires?"
"Sorry, I don't have time for this right now. I will be back later."
"But I can't hold it. I need a jug, you know, a urinal, anything. How long would that take?"
The lady turned around and walked out of the room without an answer.
I rang again, and kept on ringing until my bladder gave out, and with my face burning I wet the bed for the first time in decades. This was unacceptable. I wasn't in any position to do anything about my situation, but my family was. I managed to grab the telephone off the bedside table, and dialed Claire's cell phone number.
"Claire?" I half screamed into the phone when she answered. "It's me, Jason, please, I don't care what you have to do, but get me out of here. The nurses are trying to kill me."
"After the way they acted when you went down there, I am not surprised, but you know, I've been banned from the ward."
"What?"
"Not only am I a trouble maker, but since you are now a pediatric patient I need to be blood relative before they will let me in there," she explained.
"That's...." I looked up as a nurse entered the room.
"Who are you talking to?" she demanded
"My wife, if you don't mind. Look, Ms. West," I said reading her name tag, "I need dry sheets, fresh pajamas and a urinal, and blood sugar test, like now. Please. I need to go again, and I don't want to wet the bed any more."
"I don't have time for that now, but you are not allowed to make phone calls."
"Jason," Claire said loud enough for me to hear her. "I'll send Debbie in with supplies...."
The nurse yanked the phone from my hand, then from the wall before she walked out of the room, again.
"If you had time to do that, you had time to give me a little help, then I wouldn't need to make a phone call." No response. This was just great.
By the time my bladder gave out again, I was convinced that the entire staff of the pediatric ward was trying to kill me. Not one nurse would answer my call button, and I had no choice but to lie in increasingly wet sheets. I spent my time watching TV and working on getting the IV line untangled from the side rails so that I could move
my left arm, without much success.
The first night a nurse walked into my room with a tray. "You're gonna feed me? Great."
"What's going on here," she said sniffing, with a look of concern on her face.
I blushed. "I've got no way to go to the bathroom. Can't move my arm," I said
and showed her. "They're too busy to give me a jug or anything, and I'm really wet."
"I can - see that. I'll see what I can do, but here's your dinner."
"
Thanks," I said looking at the tray. "Don't I get a diabetic diet?"
She frowned, and picked up a ticket. "Jason Todd, regular diet. That's you, right?"
I nodded. "I can eat the meats, but not all that fruit. Thanks."
A few minutes later, I heard the cafeteria lady outside my room. "What do you mean you don't have time? This kid is sopping wet. He needs help."
"It's not your concern, and we will get to it when we have the time," I heard another lady say. "That will be all."
"You can be sure the hospital will hear about this. This is child abuse, pure and simple. What did that little boy ever do to you?"
The nurse walked away without an answer I could hear.
The next day was more of the same. The ladies didn't even speak to me as they changed my IV bag. The lady who brought lunch promised to get help, and the lady who brought dinner, the same one from the night before, left to get a doctor. Nothing else happened.
****