Psych ABC
I wandered campus looking for room 100B. It was my first day of spring semester and my first psychology class ever. Three more credits down the hatch I thought. All the rooms on the main floor were marked 200 and all those on the second floor 300. I stopped and asked the receptionist were I could find my room, she gave me the cold regular stare and with an annoyed voice told me that it was downstairs. I slapped my forehead in amazement that I could be so stupid. I thanked her as she walked away from me, back turned. Walking down a flight of stairs and across a narrow hallway I walked into the room and took a seat. I was the first one there and a good fifteen minutes early. I felt like such a keener but then again I was excited about the whole experience of post secondary. I kept moving my feet out of anxiousness across the carpet hoping for the class to start. A few people made their way in and sat throughout the room evenly dispersed. When the digital clock at the front of the class finally hit 8:00 AM there were nine other students in the class. Oddly enough I was the only male in the class I chalked it up to more women taking degrees then men in Universities in this era. Upon further inspection five of them seemed to be my age while two others seemed to be in their twenties and the other two in their late thirties. The clock read 8:01 when the professor Mrs. Rivera entered. She was slim clearly in her early forties with short professionally styled hair. She wore casual khakis and a tight black cotton shirt. As is with three hour classes she began the lesson almost immediately. Her method was a bit unnerving though she would often relate examples to her daughter who was eighteen like me. It was hard to pay attention to the lesson as I kept looking at her beautiful legs. She caught me on one occasion a few days later and I was more careful from then on.
That night I had a wet dream which I remembered from the day’s lesson was due to some subliminal desire. All I remembered was an attractive woman who was cooing at me as she stripped then I awoke. Today’s topic was sexual processes and their effects on the mind. Clearly the effect on me was blushing as we came to the topic of wet dreams. I blushed at the very mention, Mrs. Rivera noticed and smiled which made me blush more as heads turned my way (even though for only a second) I felt like I was under intense surveillance. As the lesson went on her constant mentioning of the word sex made me feel warm and light headed. I wanted her and I couldn’t get the idea out of my head. She had the body of a thirty year old fashion model. Two hours to go and I felt so horny thankfully our hourly ten minute break arrived and I hurried to the bathroom to adjust myself and cool off my face. As I re-entered the class I noticed a test sheet on the desk.
“Oh yeah…” I muttered to myself remembering only now that quiz one was right now. I remembered very little except stuff on the sex topic. Getting back my grade wasn’t too pleasing I had just barely passed with a five out of ten. The class average was eight. Suddenly I felt like I didn’t belong here like I was out of my league. “My five year old could pass this.” I heard one of the ladies in the back say to another. “Oh they’ll be getting quite harder.” Mrs.Rivera chuckled. As everyone else laughed I smiled uncomfortably knowing this was about to get worse.
Day five’s topic was hypnosis and subliminal messages. The more she went on about suggestion plantation in the human mind the more I felt like I was sitting through a sci-fi movie. We were all made to watch a subliminal video which apparently implanted certain thoughts in each of our heads. Waves of light and spiral shapes with random words were uttered or shown for fifteen minutes. Afterwards we were each taken aside and interviewed apparently this was research that we had agreed to when we signed our release forms, I studied as I awaited my turn to be interviewed, I was the last. As I sat down in a desk next to her she smiled at me and began asking questions. “What words do you remember from the film? Looking at her shyly I responded “Bottle, car, beach, baby, sock, mama, watch and bib.” “Seven out of eighteen” she nodded. “Why those words?” I really didn’t know why but I remembered “They sounded the loudest”. She smiled to herself as she checked off a few more boxes. I craned my neck to look but she scolded me “Ah ah ah….mustn’t look.” I blushed as usual. Then she presented me with a coloring book and some crayons. “This is part of the test just color for a bit and then I’ll ask you a few more things”. None of the other pages were coloured … was I the only one doing this. It made me feel strange and immature but I did it for a few minutes. She returned and resumed questioning “Who’s your favourite?” she pointed to the characters. I pointed out the baby cartoon mouse then shook my head “None …” I looked at her for awhile as she checked off a few more things. As she stood up before me felt my brain panicky looking up at her as she looked down at me. With a smile she shook my hand and thanked me for taking part. The fact that I had just gained a free seven percent bonus to my grade did nothing to alleviate my nervousness. That whole weekend all I could think about was her.
When Monday came I was a bit tired and shaky but I went to class not able to afford an absence at my grade status. Chemical make up of the brain was written on the board as I walked in a minute late but as a few eyes turned to me it felt like I had committed a grave error. Mrs.Rivera simply smiled and said hi as was usual and made a sheepish hi back as my voice croaked. It hadn’t done that in a year. As class dragged on all I heard was a jumble of sentences hardly related to another. “Brain cells at this age… which affects the formation of the body cells… basic human make up…environment as the catalyst to development…any questions?... mental alterations and physiological…onto our next chapter…”. It went on like this until our second break. Quiz one had been bad but quizzes two even worse. I started out without a pencil and was too shy and embarrassed to ask for one. Mrs.Rivera asked me if I needed a pencil and I nodded. She shook her head as she went through her purse and retrieved a yellow crayon. “Sorry it’s all I have my six year old must have dropped it in there somehow. Here you go.” She handed it to me smiling warmly. I was relegated to using a child’s tool as if it were normal. “Th…thanks” I squeaked. I was so nervous I checked the wrong circles and couldn’t concentrate on the questions. Time was up and I handed my sheet, a minute later I got back a four out of ten. I felt like crying and walked back to my desk clearly upset and shaken. I was going to fail. When she offered us a final experiment for seventeen percent or two more quizzes I instantly agreed to the experiment next Monday. I was the only one.
Self study in class or experiment with Mrs.Rivera. Suddenly I wished I had chosen the first. The experiment was in our regular class but I want allowed to leave. I was given a large glass of water to “freshen my senses”. Her locking of the nearest door did nothing to calm me down. She sat on top of a desk two spots down from me. My desk felt spacious more so than my usual desk. She looked taller than me atop the desk and it made me feel little. “Now for your big test” she cooed down at me. She handed me the crayon again, this time quite casually. I tugged at the neck line of my loose shirt feeling uncomfortably warm. Her sexy body closer than ever made me warm in my pants. My fidgeting in the desk made her giggle softly but she quickly regained her composure and began the questioning.
“How old are you?”
“Eighteen.”
“My oldest is fifteen…”
“How do you feel being the youngest in the class?”
“It’s not a big deal, I guess.” I was lying it made me feel out of place.
“What was the most scaring thing that happened to you during your grade school years? You don’t have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable…” Inside I felt compleed to answer her though.
“I had a …accident… in grade one and again in grade four and six…” I shyly said.
“A potty accident?” she said re-assuringly. I nodded and yes and blushed hotly.
These life experience questions went for what seemed like hours but in reality was only fifteen minutes. The anxiety was getting to me as my stomach started to hurt and my bladder felt like it was going to burst. “I have to use the washroom I don’t feel so good”.
She nodded and I walked slowly out to the hall. I had never been in this part of the building before and had no clue where the washroom was. Frantically I paced the corridors but found no sign of it anywhere. Now it hurt badly after holding it for so long. The odd person walked by but it was too bashful to ask for directions. I wandered back to class to tell her I had to go home. Just as I touched the metal door handle I felt a light spurt shoot into my pants. Oh no my mind raced. I looked in and hid my body around the rest of the door way. “I feel really bad I have to go home, sorry…can we finish it some other day?” She looked at me inquisitively and didn’t respond for a bit. “Sure…” Before she could say anything else I thanked her and rushed through the hallway. Every step I took drenched my pants. I was lucky no one but a desk lady was around. I could hear Mrs. Rivera’s heels click out into the hall as my soles squeaked a wet noise.
As I made my way up the stairs I tumbled and fell backwards. My overconfidence in stair hoping made for a harsh fall. The main hall to the outside was just out of reach. I was sitting there at the bottom of the stair well whimpering in my wet pants. I felt like such a baby. I heard heels clicking right behind me come to a stop.
“Aww….Seth…do you need a hand?” I heard Mrs.Rivera saying behind an above me.
“Yeth...pwease…” I said with a clear lisp.
She grabbed me under the arm pits and lifted me up with little or no effort. Further amazement came when I notice I was looking up at her slightly. This is impossible only a few minutes ago I had been a few inches taller. It was her heels, it had to be! She took me by the hand and we walked in the opposite direction I was headed.
“Where are we going?” I said in younger sounding voice.
“Where going to get you cleaned up!” she said in a strict and loud voice, a few heads turned from near by benches and I swear I heard the desk lady giggle. Her prior childish treatment of me seemed coincidental almost accidental but what was happening now was not. Her grip was iron like and I couldn’t get away. The view point from my height suggested that I was twelve now only chest level with her. I did know whether to be horny at the sight of her beautiful breasts or to feel little as they obscured my view of her face. I couldn’t contain myself any longer.
“Waaaaahhhhh!......let me go!....” I sobbed loudly.
“Stop being such a brat if you don’t want the process to accelerate…I can’t believe it actually worked...” She grinned down at me.
I was so scared she had some how turned back time on me. The worst part was that I had no clue how far back I could fall. Feeling my soggy pant cling to my legs as they slowly slipped past my thighs. The moisture was the only thing keeping them on. The smell of urine around me contrasted sharply with her expensive perfume. My shirt was now a tent the only thing keeping me hidden from the world. The obvious happened as we were walking. I tripped on my under wear and pants. My shoes sat far behind me in a puddle near the stair well. I hit the ground face first and bawled my head off. The odd sinking feeling, like riding an elevator down was shaking my body again. I gave up fighting her hoping that if I was a good boy ... err … if I behaved that she’d somehow turn me back. Was there a way back? The thought of staying like this or younger made me cry like the child I had become. Prom was long gone. Reading seemed a daunting task as the numbers and letters on the rooms we had passed became vaguer as she dragged me along. I felt scared, curious, embarrassed, small and helpless all at the same time. I didn’t understand this at all my mind froze I was too scared to think I could feel another tantrum coming on. I struggled against her trying to stop walking but I ended up being dragged along. The massive door to the women’s washroom opened up as my chances to escape closed.
“I can’t go in there! Don’t make me…” I sputtered even though I was somewhat intrigued by entering this forbidden place.
“Maybe when you were a big boy it would have mattered but no woman will find your little tush offensive I thinks it’s rather cute! And it’ll be more so in a minute.” She said in a suggestive manner that ended with her laughing at my predicament.
Her word’s gained meaning when I saw the changing table and diaper dispenser up ahead. No! Not diapers! Even if she wanted to I’ll never fit so there’s no way…then she picked my chubby body up by the arm pits and began to lower the table.
As I made contact with the table a cold shiver went up my spine. She laid me down. What at one point would have seemed like a small surface felt like large plateau. There I was naked before her eyes and not at all like I imagined in fantasies. My above average “love toy” (as I had heard in an erotic TV. show once) had been taken down several notches to an “ity bity wee wee” as Mrs.Rivera called it. I felt the cold plastic spread under my back and bottom as it grew about me. The smell of baby wipes was in the air as I turned my head to the diaper dispenser. I bawled louder than before unable to accept my cruel and undeserved fate. She buckled the restraining straps around my “tummy” and stepped over to the dispenser. She scrounged about in her pockets for a few long seconds and muttered in disappointment.
“Dam it!” she brought out some small change in her hand. She was short of change; my heart skipped a beat thinking I had been saved. She looked down with a blank stare and with her head turned to the side.
“Well baby, mama’s short some change so you’ll have to wait a few minutes before we can get that little tushie in a Pamper, mama’s going to her car she’ll be right back.”
She tickled my tummy and I let out a little squeal. The giantess walked away leaving me strapped to the changing table. Those curved hips walking farther away seeming less like something sexual and more like something that I’d be seated on very soon. This was my chance I waited till I thought she was out of hearing range and bawled my head off. She wouldn’t be back for another eight minutes four minutes towards the parking lot and four minutes back. Part of me wanted someone to walk in and carry me away to safety but the other part feared anyone else seeing me in this helpless state. I wanted nothing more than to wake up and hope this was nothing more than a nightmare. Somehow I seriously doubted it. This was far too vivid to be anything but real. The door opened but I t wasn’t Mrs.Rivera it was a girl of about eight. I felt even less safe knowing how erratic kids could be. She walked up with a big grin to me.
“Hi baby! Where’s your mommy? Don’t ya have one? Are you an orphan? Awwww that’s sad, I’ll be your mommy!” she giggled with glee.
I had no clue of knowing where this would go. With only the mot basic control of my body I could do nothing. Mama and crying were my only other means of communication. I was screwed. She un-buckled me and carried my naked form out the door. Oh no the nearby grade school was visiting. They were touring the library. Luckily we weren’t headed in that direction. Just as we had turned the hallway into the exit I heard the ominous clicking of heels. Mrs.Rivera was in for a surprise.
The outside world looked so different from my shrunken view point. The doors I had once pushed open with ease were now massive immovable barriers. The narrow path to the parking lot was a wide cement road. This girl was as absent minded as any I had ever seen. She hardly acknowledged me and seemed more concerned with the most passable of things, this was the person who I had to trust to save me. I had to work with what little I had. Panic in the past had only worsened my troubles sending me into this downward spiral but in reality my composure came from the lack of any immediate threats but being a baby was the most humiliating ordeal ever faced. There were many times that I simply could not think, like an animal mesmerized by a flashlight or a more appropriate simile like a helpless child. The elementary school loomed over head like a labyrinth. Once I was in getting out would be a challenge. I wasn’t too surprised to see few people take note of me. The few kids that questioned where the baby had come from were told that I was her little brother. They didn’t press her any further. I was trying to remember the sequence of turns we had through the halls. Left, straight, left and straight again till we came up to a hall lined with four class rooms and many lockers. She placed me on the somewhat un-swept floor much to my discomfort. She began to unlock her combination.
“Thirty six, sixteen and…uhm….four? No…Nine! …no…” she began to sound frustrated and kicked her locker. The sound made me feel like crying but I contained myself. The floor shifted under me somewhat and everything felt somewhat closer. Was I growing back again? If I did it wasn’t much maybe not more than five inches. She looked down at me clearly unhappy.
“I’m gonna go ask Mrs.Fairweather my com number don’t go anywhere baby! Okay?” she marched through the double door up ahead and vanished out of sight. Her lack of responsibility in the area of child care was just the opportunity I needed. I tried getting up but my un-steady legs buckled and I fell on my soft bottom. Tears strolled down my face but this time I held the crying back. I began crawling in the opposite direction she had headed, back to the entrance. I was jarred by the fact that in one minute she had cleared the hall but in four minutes I had only made it to the last door. Looking inside I notice the usual classroom layout but what caught my eye was a single purple rain coat hanging on a row of hooks. The barney emblem on the back told me it was for a kindergartener. Luck seemed to be on my side. I crawled towards the jacket and leaned up against side panelling. I nearly tumbled back when I felt the ground shift again. I had regained my ability to walk, slightly. A fallen broom nearby served as a poker which I used to get the raincoat off the hook. Success! I put it on after a few tries. It brushed the floor by a foot. It would have to do. I assumed myself to be not quite kindergarten age by this time most likely a pre-scholler. I was probably four that gave me a sinking feeling in my stomach but I focused my thoughts elsewhere. Average home time for most kids was 3:00 and it was already 2:50. I smiled as I realized I could read again. I had to get out of here lest I risked getting caught. Light rain pitter patted across the windows foretelling of a storm to come. Right, straight, right and straight again lead me to the front entrance. The coast was clear. One of the set of double doors was open and I rushed in. No sooner had I entered when I heard the marching feet and loud noise coming from the returning group. A cold sweat broke out across my body and my heart stopped. I backed up against the wall and hid behind a large indoor potted plant. As I peered over the rim of the hard plastic container I saw a giantess teacher walk by followed by a throng of giant kids. I’d probably only come up to their knees. The last few let the un-oiled and creaky doors open far enough for me to toddle out as they slowly closed. Freedom!
I toddled as quickly as I could out through the parking lot and towards the fence that ran back to campus. I stopped and huddled under a near by tree. My options were limitless but my toddler form restricted me from many of them. Why is this happening to me? It had to be some type of experiment because I never bothered anyone so revenge was out of the question. What was the point of all this and how far would it go? I shook my head; I had to concentrate on what I did know. Somehow I grew up a little every time I managed to think my way out of something. That had to have something to do with it. The odd car passed by every few minutes on the opposite side of the tree as I contemplated what to do next. I could try walking home but that would take me at least five hours in current state not to mention the endless amount of danger I could get into. The danger didn’t bother me so much as the reality that my keys were in my pants, I wouldn’t be able to reach the handle, there was no guarantee that once there I would even progress any further and I didn’t understand much about my current situation. The chances that anyone would believe my story were slim. The triangular birthmark on my left hand was my only proof of identity. Few people on campus knew about it or had noticed. The rain was intensifying and had the chance to become a storm. How appropriate. As the sky darkened campus looked more foreboding. I trekked through the soft grassy areas taking care not to be seen. Being caught would almost certainly mean a trip to the orphanage and that would push me far off track I might never find a solution to this. I reached the building where my regression had taken place. There were three cars in the parking lot but I soon saw six more pull in and park side by side. Two groups of three women left the parking lot and made their way into the building I couldn’t make out any faces from this distance and the shrubbery in my field of vision. They seemed like a serious bunch. Mrs. Rivera’s silver car was still there. Classes were over but the library was open till 6:00. Things became muddled in my head. My hiding place behind the shrubbery kept me well hidden until it was safe to come out again. The raincoat was still a foot off the floor. No new breakthroughs. I was getting cold and my little feet were all muddy. An idea struck me. If I could get my cell phone in back pack phone my cousin (who just happened to be a researcher into paranormal phenomena) get her to come over here and pick me up then she just might be able to help me. The door to the building was wheel chair accessible. I found a nearby thin twig and poked at the button. It snapped and the door didn’t open. A fist sized rock lay nearby and I hurled it as hard as a four year old could at the button. The door opened and I made my way inside. The immediate area was vacant, throwing the rock had proved to be a worthy risk, no one was around to hear it. The rain coat fit perfectly.
Toddling over towards the top of the stair well where my regression had occurred I peered down. Nothing at the bottom. I held onto the bars that made up the railing and carefully descended the stairs. A few of the lights had been turned off most likely to save energy and all classroom doors were closed except for room 100B. The light inside was on but there were no indications of human presence. Perfect. My desk was just by the door. I walked right underneath it with out having to crouch. Unzipping the first smaller pocket of my backpack I took out my cell phone and stuck it in the raincoat’s pocket. Moving the backpack and binder would be impossible. With books included the back pack alone weighed twenty five pounds, little less than half my current bodyweight. I whimpered in defeat when I couldn’t even budge the bag. I felt such fear of being discovered again by Mrs.Rivera she’d reduce me back to an infantile state after all the trouble I had growing up again. I was always an independent guy even at eighteen but now I felt so helpless. If it wasn’t for that girl Mrs.Rivera would still have me in her clutches. Now I had to phone my cousin and depend on her to save me. It all reinforced my position inside of me. A loud voice near the stair well startled me.
“Who tracked all this mud in here!?”
Oh no! Glancing down at my feet I suddenly remembered I had no shoes on. Hiding in the grassy places got my feet all dirty and I forgot to clean them. Heels started to click down the stairs. I ran out into the hall trying to be as quite as possible. My rain coat causing some commotion. This was it I couldn’t get out of this. I had to make the call before I was caught.
“Is there a naughty little boy some where in here? I sure hope there isn’t cause he’d get a spanking.”
The voice wasn’t Mrs.Rivera’s but it sounded like someone who definitely wasn’t on my side. I scurried back into the room and hid under the podium. I was concealed in the shadows but that woman whoever she was still searching. Just a foot in front of me was a fallen piece of paper. I must have bumped the podium or cause a current of air. I quickly snatched it and looked it over. There were a few psychological terms I understood on it like: re-education, hypnosis, subliminal messaging, the plasticity of the brain and a header on the sheet of physiological retro-structuring. This was an experiment of some kind after all. There was not much else on the sheet that made any sense on how to reverse the process. My gut wrenched, what if there was no way. I had to call for help. Further horror fell over me as another mistake of mine might cost my freedom. The pockets of the raincoat were wet from the storm, so was my cell. My relief came when I heard the operator’s voice in chunks. It still partially worked. I dialled Aria’s number. Dam it! Only the answering machine!
“Please help me Aria! It’s me Seth! I’ve been regressed into a toddler! Come quick I’m in the Library Hall at College Campus. Hurry!” I whispered with a desperate voice. At least some one knew now. Two large nylon legs passed by the podium and stopped right in front of me. Two red heels and a black mini skirt hovered above. All I could do was tremble. I was frozen in fear.
A solitary tear streaked down my face knowing the game was over. Then I heard keyboard buttons being clicked away at. The power cord against my spine, she was typing something. Suddenly her giant arm passed only inches away from my face. My heart stopped and my body went limp with coldness all over. A CD was sucked into the disk tray and the hand went back to typing. A female voice began to dictate information to the program.
“Subject: male, eighteen years old, six feet tall, one hundred and ninety pounds, well conditioned.”
“Thesis: the manipulation of the human gene concerned with age”
“Target: male, twelve months old, fifty five inches, eighteen pounds, regular conditioning”
My mind numbed to a crawl. As the typing went on in slow motion that last line kept on repeating in my head. The legs walked away and out the room into the cold hallway. I was getting too scared and ideas of escape rushed through my mind. Aria would be here soon as she would be getting the message with in ten minutes and she would jump at the chance to investigate such a phenomenon. If I could just hide behind the front counter in the library I would be safe till she came. As I got up the rain coat brushed against the floor making noise so I quickly discarded it. My reflection on the steel leg of a desk almost made me want to act like the age I was. I ran as fast as I could out into the hallway.
The same stair case where it all started was only thirty feet away but it looked more to me like a hundred. Only about twenty more steps away and I suddenly felt my stomach tighten into a not. I let out a little whimper of pain and stood there holding my tummy. It hurt so much. I felt vulnerable out in the open hunched over in pain. I wanted to pee pee and poo poo. Those were the only words I could find to describe the feeling. My scholarly vocabulary had been reduced to a pre-schooler’s babbling. Then I heard that chilling and familiar giggle along with the nearing click of high heels. A large curved feminine shadow engulfed me and my escape. Her feminine eclipse made me appendages feel limp and powerless. After all my meticulous planning and educated guesses my one moment of excitement had ruined everything. I began breathing faster and faster I couldn’t help it. Two arms extended to the hips of the shadow. One foot started to tap.
“There’s my little man!” Mrs. Rivera cooed loudly.
Her words, her height and her age left me feeling like a total baby. I threw a temper tantrum. There I was a naked little two year old clutching her pant leg at the shin while she laughed uncontrollably and made cutesy pouty faces at me. My bawling ceased for a moment when I felt a warm thin stream down my leg. The puddle around me meant that it had been going on for a little while before I even noticed it.
“You are officially un-potty trained Sethy it’s back to diapers for you my dear.” She snickered maliciously.
I felt my world dissolving around me. Cups replaced by nursing bottles. Mature adult clothing replaced by cute baby onsies. My queen sized bed replaced by a crib with water proof covers and an ever circling baby mobile above. My CK briefs replaced with thick disposable diapers. Strutting by the sexy ladies in the lounge would give way to being bounced on some woman’s knee as those same sexy ladies looked on cooing. Sexy was no longer an option, adorable was the reality.
As had happened only a while ago the floor moved in an outward direction under my tender soles. The bottom of her knee rose above my line of vision as her black heels neared rapidly. Then it stopped like an amusement park ride that rides to sky then plummets to the earth. My world was spinning. She just looked down at me to see what would happen next. She wasn’t poised to strike; she had me in the palm of her hand and didn’t need to worry. First my bottom moved back then my top leaned forward and then back again threatening to topple me. My bowlegged stance was enough of an indicator that my first steps were still a long while away. I closed my eyes as I fell backwards.
“Ooppsies!” Mrs. Rivera chuckled as she moved her foot between my legs.
My soft bottom made instant contact with her cool glossy heel. She let me sit there for a moment, admiring her work I guessed. I was too shocked to cry any more to do anything. My seven centimetre nub hung lifelessly slightly grazing her heel. The slightest interaction with a woman had often led to instant growth. The only reaction was a slight tinkle. That didn’t impress her at all.
“BABY!” she yelled angrily. Even though the building was nearly devoid of people I still cringed fearing that some one would show up and they did. Red heels, black mini skirt. Not any help just more reinforcements. Then I finally saw her face and I recognized it. She was with the group that had left the parking lot. Mrs.Rivera wasn’t alone. It was almost like a coven slash sisterhood. All hopes faded drastically. By this point I had been held effortlessly chin resting on her shoulder as her arm supported my bottom and her hand held my entire back.
“Is that the subject? I didn’t recognize him.” She said.
“That’s part of the point of the change … speaking of which.” Mrs.Rivera and the other woman glanced at her right shoe.
My toothless gums found comfort in her long hair. She took me threw the empty halls until we finally came to that dreaded door. The stick figure in a dress, the women’s washroom. Upon entering the smell of perfume and sanitary product hit me hard. She walked forward across the shiny tiles as I watched the door slowly close. Her friend waited by the door almost awaiting something. She started patting me on the back and shushing me. Even though I was resigned to my fate I was still afraid. I heard the changing table lower as she spun me around and onto it. She wasted no time in strapping me down. There was no escape this time. The hard cold plastic slab beneath me sent shivers all over my body. Instinctively I began kicking my feet in the air. She scrounged in her pocket for some change and this time came up with the two dollars. In went the money out came the package. She smiled at me and began describing each piece to me in that voice you use when talking to a baby.
“This is so that your sweet little bum bum smells like a nursery!” she laid the talcum powder aside on the counter near by.
“This is to keep you nice and smooth so that you don’t get a diaper rash!” she put aside the Vaseline.
“And this is to keep your little messes where they belong, you’ve already shown me that the potty is way beyond your little grasp, not only is it necessary it’s cute!” she placed the crinkly thick diaper next to me.
What happened next was half way between dream and nightmare. Mrs. Rivera worked the Vaseline around my whole pelvic region and some in behind. Next came a liberal powdering. The finale came when she grabbed both ankles and lifted my legs and bum into the air effortlessly. She slid the diaper under me and laid me back down. She was taking pleasure in watching me squirm. Each movement was deliberate and clearly enjoyed. She waved bye bye to my manhood as brought the front down on it. The tabs crackled open and were taped firmly into place. She unstraped me and placed me in front of the sink mirror. She wanted me to see clearly my new role. She threw the wrappings into the trash where I swore I saw a pant leg. She placed me on her hip and proudly declared me diapered.
“Comfy? I hope you like your new wardrobe because Pampers is a far as you’ll be going.” She said in cruel delight.
It felt so warm and thick. Closing my legs more than a few inches was out. With her every step through the halls and finally to the main entrance my crinkle resounded along side her heel clicks.
I only managed a few gurgles but they were ignored by the two femme fatales. She patted my diaper clad bottom rather harshly and made me whimper.
“Quiet Sethy or you’ll get a spanking!”
No sooner had she scolded me than I saw Aria open the door and approach us. Please don’t walk by I pleaded mentally. She made eye contact with me and smiled. She made eye contact with Mrs. Rivera and smiled too.
Aria looked at me as if she recognized my face and she would have if she thought back eighteen years. She used to baby sit me a lot. Seeing her from this vantage point gave a whole new meaning to her remarks about “I know you real well, I used to change your diapers kiddo”. She tickled me about the torso and cooed “cootchy coo” before speaking to Mrs. Rivera who handed me off to her friend and promptly left with out a single word. This baby might look familiar but then again a lot of babies do. I was just another baby.
“Hi I’m Ms.Nadine and you must be the nanny, this here is …. A little guy who needs a babysitter, his aunty is….out to Newark, several days away and she wont be back for…. a week, she’s his only family, uhh…. Due to her busy schedule she can’t be around but she can pay for a permanent nanny service till he’s eighteen….”
Aria nodded with her big smile as always, Mrs. Nadine paid her a couple hundred enough for a few weeks. Aria went to her car and got things ready. Meanwhile I was given an injection which appeared to have a micro chip in it. “There now we can an eye on you, among other things, wherever you are” Nadine said calmly as she packed up the needle and as she did so I caught a glimpse of a folder thick with paper entitled “Pysch ABC : Permanent Psycho Regression”. Aria returned and I was promptly whisked away into her car, the school becoming smaller as we drove further away to daycare. I had a terrible feeling that it was over, no matter what I did or how I felt the two women had complete control over me. I realized that no matter how much I would try to muster up any confidence that their cruel mind games would whittle my confidence back down to that of an insecure child. Permanent kept on flashing in my mind, the state itself wasn’t permanent as I had seen but the condition was, every time I felt the least bit childish down I went back through the stages of childhood and into babyhood. Sunshine Daycare loomed ahead with its chain fences and slides clearly too small for any one older than five. Women exiting the building with strollers further buried my sense of hope, as Aria opened the back door and lifted me out of my safety seat and into a stroller which I was strapped to I couldn’t feel anymore babyish. Aria entered and dropped me off and left to get more toddlers for this daycare and others.
Days passed by and no one questioned why I remained. I saw Ms.Nadine a couple of times she saw me once as I fussed over the strained banana being forced into my mouth. She always bought a handheld device which she even flashed to my face and lifted out of reach (I was to weak to take it anyways) saying “Not for baby”. What I did put the final stamp on my fate, an image of me at different states, ages one through five with in a circle diagram numbers and words I no longer understood were all about the screen. Circle not a line pointing one way, I had a feeling this was going to be a constant cycle. No one would question my disappearance much if at all being that I was an independent student with only occasional ties to family. No one cared except for Ms.Rivera and Ms.Nadine who came by to make sure I had only the best of care. The staff didn’t care, most of the women were either mean or apathetic, as long as the cash came in and some one came in to check up on me the situation remained the same. Standing up for myself was no longer an option when a woman could easily pick me up and give me a spanking. It’s pretty hard to stand up to a woman when you have a saggy diaper and she looks like she’s fifty feet tall.
Whatever ends the project had I don’t know but I feel like I will pretty soon ever since the overflow of babies into the nursery and the privatization of the center last year. Familiar faces from my old Pysch class seemed to be employed here. The woman carrying me over to the nursery seems familiar maybe an old class mate? As I’m strapped down to the changing table I see a photo of the five new owners, two of the faces are Ms.Rivera and Ms.Nadine, their smiles make me suck my thumb for comfort as the front of my diaper is secured tightly about my waist. There is a cry-baby in the time out corner I wonder if it’s simply a bratty kid or a defiant regressee who won’t give up. Spankings, forced feedings, diaper changes and his or her shrunken state will eventually sink in as reality. I shrug as I’m placed in a play pen by the window. Some numbers and a backwards S with two lines through it on the other side near a fussy group of ….subjects? A young woman pears in through the other side comes in talks with a nanny for a bit and leaves with the baby. One of the ladies looks at me and whispers “Don’t worry Ms.Nadine and her colleagues will never sell their prize experiment.” I gurgle happily as the tall lady smiles at me.